Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of
evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene
pool--by removing themselves from it.
2003 Darwin Award Winner
Unconfirmed by Darwin
(February 2003, East Timor) A man was found lying facedown, covered in mud
and blood, the apparent victim of a street crime in Dili. It was not until
a post mortem examination was conducted that U.N. police were able to
reconstruct his last moments, based on an unusual discovery in his pants.
Justin's Safety Tip: If you're
ever stuck with a knife, DON'T PULL IT OUT! It will to be painful as
heck, but it's acting as a plug for your wound. Pull it out and all
you're left with is a hole ready to leak whatever's inside out.
This up-and-coming young man decided it was cool to shove his weapons, two
long knives, down the waistband of his trousers. Unsheathed. The hapless
fellow jumped over a small fence and landed in a large puddle of mud. He
slipped, which sent the blade of his "trouser knife" into his leg, severing
his femoral artery. This has the same effect as cutting off the bottom of
a paper cup filled with water. In thirty seconds, one loses enough blood
to be rendered unconcious, with nearly complete blood loss within two
minutes. He bled to death before he could stagger ten feet from the
Reader comment: "Nearly a do-it-yourself briss (circumcision)."