The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally remove themselves from it in a spectacular manner!
Steel Macbook ArmorYou are wearing body armor in a dangerous warzone. You spot a loose Macbook. You need a Macbook, where to hide it? With quick reflexes a Russian soldier slid that laptop into his chest armor pocket, replacing... ...
Pastor Shawn Meets His MakerBoating on Lake Seminole was a delight to Shawn and his friend, up until his boat began to founder. And he had no life vest! But no worry. Other boaters on the lake called the Pinellas County Sheriff Rescue... ...
Tombstoned FootballerDutch football pro Mourad Lamrabatte was hungry for the thrill of Tombstone'ing off a cliff into the ocean. Thinking, 'My athletic strength will carry me way out into the beautiful blu ...
Death By Water Bottle Waterfall- A man sneaked into the back of a closed supermarket on Easter Monday, and that was the last break-in of his life. He paused to enjoy a drink of water, pulling a bottle from a towering tableau, and the whole dar ...
Molten ManPompeii And Circumstance: The 75 year old was game for an off-limits sortie into Volcanoes National Park. A resident of the nearby town of Hilo, the elder hiker was well aware of lava's distinctive molten danger. Probably had a picture of ...
The Car Wash BluesPerplexing. No one knows why a Las Vegas resident jumped out of their Scion after driving it into an Escondido car wash, all we know is that they did. Avoiding a bee? Twerking? Spotted a Jackson? 56- ...
124 Snakes Seek Less Annoying HousemateAuthorities making a welfare check found David Riston dead alone in a house with numerous species of snake, some venomous. Cobras, rattlesnakes, black mambas, and a gigantic python... ...
Superman Stupor-manA relatable Retro Darwin Award prank called 'Supermanning' gained popularity in the US Navy ten years before this 2005 fatality: Hold tight to a makeshift harness and leap from the rear-end of an airborne military helicopter, to fly like... Stupor-Man!! ...
Pretty Fly For A Dead GuyA West Houston student pilot named Solomon was allowed to solo in a Cessna 172 a few weeks before the incident described below. After the solo flight, the exhilarated 23-year-old decided to buy a different plane ...
Struck SpeechlessRoll a fat cigar of brainpower for two mental midges who climbed out of their vehicles on busy Interstate 80 to argue about who slammed into whom. In short order both argle bargle bots got slammed, this time withou ...
Rock HoundOpus-40 is an ambitious stoneworks compared to Stonehenge: Six acres of stone ridges, bridges, and moats puzzled together tightly using no mortar by Mr. Harvey Fite. A magnificent landscape of Hudson Valley stoner madnesss! ...
Pinnacle Of StupidityIn the end, cold was not the culprit! 'Hands are numb...but must operate smart phone,' muttered 47-year-old Tedzu to his livestream audience as he skidded and stumbled up snow-covered Mt Fuji ...
A Slack-Robatic EffortAt midnight the phone rang for Police Inspector Campbell Hill. 'What? Someone fell into the sinkhole??? Bloody hell. Better ring up the Fire Department. We will need their Rope Rescue Rig for this one.' Cave ...
As Buried As The TreasureMichael Sexson, 58, had read of a buried treasure from a book authored by an eccentric and controversial art dealer named Forrest Fenn. In 'The Thrill of the Chase,' Fenn claims that he himself buried two ...
Pilot Patrick's In-Flight ShowerWith 10,000 hours of flight time and an instructor certificate, when aviation fuel (AVGAS) entered the cockpit and sloshed around his feet Patrick's attitude was, 'What, Me Worry?' ...
Maine Man Boffed By Booby-Trap Maine Man Boffed By Booby-Trap Ronald Cyr, 65, was shot dead on Thanksgiving evening in the rural town of Van Buren. Upon investigation, it was determined that the shooter was none other than Ron ...
Two Texans Die Trying May their experiment be a warning to you, my friend. The Drawbridge on Black Bayou was evidentially an irresistible Friday Night challenge to Texas Man (32) and Texas Man Two (aged 23)... ...
Rhino Poacher Killed By ElephantIt makes a funny headline, but it's no laughing matter. The elephant-trampled and lion-digested poacher had illegally crept into a national park with murder in mind, for there is ...
Boomerang Drone ZoneAn ISIS fighter in Iraq was killed by hxx own drone, launched to attack UK Troops based near Mosul. A security source reported, 'This idiot wired up a drone with explosives, but was killed when the batteries... ...
The Missionary PositionJohn Allen Chau, a self proclaimed world explorer inspired by Livingston and Jesus, was killed by the very tribe of natives he was offering eternal life. ...
Wacky WelderThe tale of Howard Miller, 39, professional welder, illustrates the pitfalls of ignoring high school chemistry with a time-saving invention. Miller spent his last moments helping weld an exhaust pipe onto a classic Holden Kingswood sedan... ...
Mind The Cone ZoneA Wanaquer man died in a vehicle fire after he drove around barricade cones and onto live power wires in Franklin Lakes morning. A good son, Anthony G. was en-route to his father's house to shovel the driveway... ...
Focus On The BearWhile driving himself and some passengers back home from a wedding, Prabhu Bhatara parked the car on the roadside to relieve himself in the woods when he spied an INJURED bear. Instead of calling the authorities t ...
Dead On Valentines DayA 19-year-old and his soon-to-be-ex were walking along the beautiful Havel River, quarreling. The frustrated man suddenly shoved the woman into the icy river! She could swim, he could not... ...
A Gun Named 'Lorena'The Buckeye Police Department reports that a man accidentally shot his own sausage while shopping in the meat aisle at Walmart. Arizona law does not require a permit to carry a firearm, so o ...
Reticulated PythonZaim Kosnan spotted a twelve-foot reticulated python dozing on the side of the road. 'That sizeable snake is worth money!' realized the 35-year-old, and he swung by his house for gloves and a sickle. Sweet succes ...
Abu HamamA sexagenarian was examining his personal weapon in his home when he inadvertently discharged it into his face! Twenty-one days after accidentally shooting himself, Abu Hamam, 62, succumbed to the self-inflicted head-bang... ...
GEOcaching Out!On a pleasant afternoon, the Motolský Brook tunnel entrance is picturesque. Not ominous. But take a look at this image of the tunnel. In a rainstorm, would YOU walk down THAT surging creek and disappear into THAT dark drainage culvert?n ...
Road-Rage-AholicsA Darwin Double! After a road collision near Stary Krzew, two men emerged from their damaged cars and began arguing over the incident. The argument grew into a physical fight that lurched from the verge into the ad ...
Booze Cruise LoserBoston friends fondly confess that there ARE Boston Harbor Booze Cruises. It's a thing. But for Aaron D., it's a thing of the past. Join me in mourning the colossal misjudgment that doomed this 21-year-old spark of light. ...
Darwin Award Shorts - Old Folks ReunionMARCH 2018, BIRMINGHAM ENGLAND || Man suffers a fatal heart attack after getting his head stuck beneath an electric footrest at the cinema while retrieving his cellphone from the floor: ...
Killer WhaleboneHistoric Darwin Award! Statesman Gouverneur Morris, a signatory to the Articles of Confederation and U.S. Constitution, died in 1816 from an infection caused by shoving a whalebone into his urethra to clear a blockage. ...
Lovestruck Louis IIIBlindly following lust, the world came crashing down upon the head of King Louis III, overzealous ruler of Francia. Despite great military success, great loss followed on its heels when a comely lady caught his eye... ...
Fumble TumbleLike a plot out of Sherlock Holmes, officials found a dead body mysteriously crumpled at the bottom of an UP-escalator at an Amtrak station at the New Carrollton stop at 2AM. Perplexed... ...
Mammoth MoronsToday's Group Darwin Award is for the males of the Woolly Mammoth species, Mammuthus primigenius, an elephant species extinct for about 10,000 years... in part due to the males' penchant for fossilization... ...
Bag-atelleThe ban on shopping bags has taken a terrible toll! A 58-year-old woman was run over by her Mazda CX7 after she pulled over to check whether the grocery bags were in the trunk. The car, evidently not secured by the parki ...
Not A Darwin WinnerDozed To Death: A deadly game of hide-and-seek with a bulldozer happened after a county maintenance worker discovered a dozen hidden pot plants and called police. Here's why this is NOT A DARWIN AWARD... ...
Red Evolution (2538) 84%
Steamy Buns (1899) 84%
Amphetamines And Aerobatics (270) 84%
Forklift Around And Find Out (434) 83%
Grim Roofer (40) 81%
Snapchat Prat (1201) 80%
Backseat Drivers (1005) 80%
#ElephantsWantPrivacy (1695) 78%
Golf Cart + Garden Hose (1129) 78%
One Way Ticket (2702) 76%
Air Strike Out (3106) 74%
Pistol Of Justice (1371) 74%
Flat Hatting Pilots (1179) 72%
503 Server Overload (2462) 69%
