Charles Darwin at a green chalkboard.

2004 Darwin Awards

Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool--by removing themselves from it in the most spectacular way possible.

Damned if You Do...
2004 Darwin Award Winner
Confirmed True by Darwin

(6 September 2004, Romania) A Pitesti man with a metal ring stuck on his penis was being sought by doctors, after he fled the hospital consumed by panic.

The unidentified 42-year-old said he put the ring on his penis after losing a bet during a drinking game at a pub. He was subsequently unable to remove the ring. Embarrassment kept him from seeking immediate medical help, but after two days, unbearable pain overcame unbearable shame, and he took his smelly and discolored member in for treatment.

Doctors told him the bad news.Gangrene had set in, and his life was in danger. The blood supply had been cut off for too long, and there was nothing they could do but remove his penis, so that the necrosis did not spread to the rest of his body.

The manhunt was ongoing. "There is no way he can escape going under the knife," said a doctor. "He must come back to the hospital and accept this." The man's only consolation is a guaranteed Darwin Award, one way or the other!

A reader writes in to say, "NOT TRUE! Some of us naturally 'little guys' have managed to have a kid or two, with a little creativity and medical intervention. Surgically cutting a tendon over the penis gives and extra inch, or more."

Share © 1994 - 2022
Submitted by: Bradley F.
Reference: Daily Record (UK), Ananova

Previous Directions Next