Charles Darwin at a green chalkboard.

2016 Darwin Awards

Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool--by removing themselves from it in the most spectacular way possible.

Masturbator Meets Hard End
2016 Darwin Award Winner
Confirmed True by Darwin

It was not traffic he was trying to beat...

(22 January 2016, Michigan) Referred to as a "distracted driver," Clifford Ray Jones, 58, was driving without pants -- without seatbelt -- and with a porno flick screening on his mobile device. Add a wide-open sunroof on a cold winter Sunday, and you have a recipe for disaster.

He should have kept his hands on the wheel instead of the stick. In the wee hours (at 3:40am) Clifford's Toyota went out of control on the onramp to I-75, rolled, and crashed, ejaculating our hero through the sunroof in a spectacular climax to his life. Come and gone, Clifford and his beloved wanky will be fondly remembered in our archives.

Many Original Submissions! © 1994 - 2022
Submitted by: Steve Uptegraft, Jennifer Serrao, Julian Summers, Carl Brandon

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