Charles Darwin at a green chalkboard.

2011 Darwin Awards

Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool--by removing themselves from it in the most spectacular way possible.

Wedding Jitters
2011 Darwin Award Winner
von Darwin als wahr bestÃĪtigt

(India) In 2004 a pre-wedding henna party was underway when a prowler with the appearance of an undead ghoul broke into the home of Indira Vegas, 23, a well-known red-headed stripper in downtown Delhi. While most of the party reacted with confusion as the prowler lurched forward, in a foetid cloud that reportedly reeked of "tear gas," Vegas approached the zombie and whacked its temple with her 5" stiletto heel. According to an eyewitness report, this dispatched the prowler, successfully halting a Class I invasion. What makes this story worthy of Darwin's notice however, is the subsequent actions of Vegas. She put the stiletto-heel shoe back on and went on to accidentally infect her sister-in-law, with what one neighbor described as a 'mis-step.' The name and whereabouts of the sister-in-law have not been released to the press. The woman, infected with a strange painful lassitude, passed into a "deep sleep" and was placed in a bedroom.

The photographer, Timothy Caes, 16, stated that the party was discussing who should report the deceased prowler to police, when a second ghoul emerged from the bedroom and began to savagely bite Vegas. Mr. Caes, the primary source of this report, is a local student who was not known to the group. He states that subsequent to this savage attack, Vegas inexlicably turned and began to menace him. Mr. Caees was able to subdue the reanimated zombies by bashing them several times with a tripod, knocking them to the floor and halting their wails.

That was enough. The sudden silence provoked a stampede of human chaos from the room, and what was effectively a herd of vertical bayonettes put an end to what was ultimately recorded as a "schizophrenic episode" on the part of the deceased.

Indra Vegas, who began her 15 minutes of fame by saving her friends, ended her life with yet another boneheaded move involving high heels. Women, high heels? Between you and me, put those things in your trash. High Heels = Natural Selection in Action.

Other High Heels Tragedies: Best wishes from Wendy Darwin. © 1994 - 2022
Reference: Coherent report from a neighbor in the adjoining flat.

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