Charles Darwin at a green chalkboard.

2003 Darwin Awards

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Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool--by removing themselves from it in the most spectacular way possible.

A Honey of a Buzz
2003 Darwin Award Winner
Confirmed True by Darwin

(September 2003, Mexico) An unidentified 60-year-old Escobedo man was still thirsty after drinking what most would consider "too much alcohol." He stumbled toward a nearby beehive, hoping to follow the beer with a bit of honey.

He thought the bees would surely share. Instead, they obeyed a Darwinian signal bred into them for millennia. Over a thousand noble fighters gave their all, sacrificed their stingers and their lives to protect the hive. The man, quite reasonably, responded with terminal anaphylactic shock.

A hospital spokesman disputed the theory that bees had killed him, attributing his demise to, "the stupid things drunken people do," and pointing out that he was otherwise healthy and would have enjoyed a long life. "The combination was lethal."

"Bees don't kill people, people kill bees."

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Reader Comments:
"Now I remember why I keep going to meetings."
"Alchohol and bees don't mix."
"Mental note: honey doesn't help hangovers."

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