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2000 Personal Accounts
The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes deceased) readers. Next


Lawnmower Mechanics 
2000 Personal Account

I personally witnessed this event from my back porch. The incident involves my neighbor. While the event did not result in death, that was certainly only due to blind luck.

My neighbor considers himself an expert on machinery, although everyone who knows him considers him an expert in idiocy. When his riding lawnmower kept stalling and eventually wouldn't start at all, he knew he was the man for the job.

From the intent way he was staring at the noncompliant tractor, it was clear that he was carefully accessing the situation. Finally, as if inspiration had overcome him, he pulled out the spark plug. Upon examining it, he noticed that it had some oil on it. Rather than wipe the oil off, he thought it would be much quicker to burn it off with a blow torch. While this may not have been the best way to remove the oil, it was effective. So when he noticed that there was also some oil in the chamber where the spark plug goes, he reasoned that since his blow torch method had been so effective before....

Did I mention that my neighbor is a professional firefighter and paramedic? © 1994 - 2020

Submitted by: MMarsh6115

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