The Darwin Awards 

Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
1999 Personals
Bridge Bowling
Packing the Wardrobe
Disco Dork
Gangster Blues
Tide-ally Impaired
Bridge Bonzai
Jump Rope Blues
Industrious Brain Dead Private
Train Dodge!
Betrayal of Trussed
Quarry Story
Unkindest Cut of All
Flak Vest Test
Coke, the Real Thing
What a Gas!
Cleaning the Head
Diving Lessons
Polar Bear Lesson
North Pacific Deckpecker
The Iceman Exiteth
Withdrawing Money
Car Surfing
Fun with Forklifts
Cement Punching Bag
Jet Ski Jock
Wives With Chloroform
Leap of Faith
Helium and Oxygen Don't Mix
Elemental Mistake
Newton's Laws of Motion
Accident Waiting to Happen
Breaking the Law
Other Personal Years 
2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 Vintage
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum


1999 Personal Accounts
The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes deceased) readers. Next


Polar Bear Lesson 
1999 Personal Account

Angelesa Novak says, "I remember this account happened in the mid- 90s. Another memorable day an Australian tourist climbed into the cage to get a better picture. Binky came away from the experience with a sneaker. To the end of his days, he had his sneaker. One of the fire departments even printed "Bad as Binky" T-shirts with a drawing of Binky with the sneaker in his mouth. Sadly both Binky and his mate died within months of each other in 96 or 97.

(1999, Fairbanks, Alaska) As an Alaska resident for 18 years, I have seen many stupid things. The topper was when two inebriated teenagers decided to swim with polar bears in the Alaska Zoo in Anchorage. They jumped over one fence and climbed through another to get to the pool, where Binky the Bear took offence and mauled the first of the intruders.

His prostate suffered dearly for this mistake, but he survived. The second boy escaped unscathed. As an interesting footnote, a new pen was under consideration because the old one was much too elaborate for its purpose of keeping the polar bears inside. In light of this escapade, maybe they should emphasise making it hard for people to get in, instead of the bears getting out.

Submitted by: Tyler Thickstun

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
Previous Directions Next

Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend © 1994 - 2022