The Darwin Awards 
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2001 Personals
Miracle Mile
Medical Misadventures
Tube Snake
Parachute Catch
Horsing Around
Monkey Business
Regular & Extra Crispy
Fleas of Fire
Real Science
Flat Fix Fizzles
Got a Match?
Uncle Rick's End
Power Over Plate Glass
Accident Prone
Workin' on the Railroad
Theoretical Knowledge
Other Personal Years 
2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 Vintage
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum


Darwin Awards
2001 Personal Accounts
Email a Friend The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. Next Prev Random

Juggle Donuts
Juggle Donuts,Not Grenades!

Not Grenades!
DarwinAwards Mug

Got a Match?  
2001 Personal Account

(January 2001) In 1994 I was a volunteer firefighter with a fair amount of training and experience under my belt, but not a lot of smarts under my cap. We lived in the country and had a "burning barrel" to dispose of our rubbish. It had rained a few days before, and now our barrel contained wet cardboard. I knew that wouldn't burn, so I got my jerry can and poured gas into the barrel. Not a lot mind you, but apparently just enough.

As luck would have it my match didn't light, so I ran back into the house to get some more, while the fumes rose from the burning barrel. I returned and stood eigt feet back from the barrel and threw a match. Did I mention my wife was standing beside me?

The resulting explosion actually made her long hair look like she had been riding a motorcycle 70 MPH with no helmet. I burnt my eyebrows and hair, and the explosion was heard down at the golf course 1/4 mile away. There was small fires burning everywhere, and all I could do was stand there staring at my wife with my jaw hanging down.

Neither of us could hear a thing as our ears were ringing to beat the band. We put out the fires with a garden hose and spent the rest of the night assuring neighbours that we had not dynamited our property. I may amaze other people but mostly I amaze myself. © 1994 - 2017
Submitted by: Don Richter

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
Previous Directions Next

Selected From The Darwin Awards Gift Shop @ Zazzle

Purchases Help Fund The Darwin Awards Team


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend