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Darwin Awards
1999 Personal Accounts

Newsletter Signup The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following Personal Accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers.

Stories Ranked by Vote

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Not Grenades!
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Bridge Bowling 8.9 (8285 votes)

Packing the Wardrobe 8.3 (4039 votes)

Disco Dork 8.1 (4041 votes)

Gangster Blues 7.7 (3119 votes)

Tide-ally Impaired 7.5 (2904 votes)

Bridge Bonzai 7.3 (2639 votes)

Jump Rope Blues 7.2 (2702 votes)

Levelled 7.1 (1625 votes)

Trephination 7.1 (2528 votes)

Industrious Brain Dead Private 6.9 (2401 votes)

Train Dodge! 6.9 (2593 votes)

Betrayal of Trussed 6.9 (2090 votes)

Quarry Story 6.7 (1822 votes)

Unkindest Cut of All 6.6 (2699 votes)

Flak Vest Test 6.6 (2800 votes)

Coke, the Real Thing 6.6 (5031 votes)

What a Gas! 6.4 (2454 votes)

Cleaning the Head 6.4 (3638 votes)

Diving Lessons 6.2 (2327 votes)

Polar Bear Lesson 6.2 (3034 votes)

North Pacific Deckpecker 6.2 (3197 votes)

The Iceman Exiteth 6.1 (1940 votes)

Withdrawing Money 6.1 (3023 votes)

Car Surfing 6.0 (3299 votes)

Fun with Forklifts 6.0 (3465 votes)

Cement Punching Bag 6.0 (2781 votes)

Jet Ski Jock 5.8 (2561 votes)

Wives With Chloroform 5.5 (2919 votes)

Leap of Faith 5.3 (2214 votes)

Helium and Oxygen Don't Mix 5.0 (2831 votes)

Elemental Mistake 4.9 (1868 votes)

Newton's Laws of Motion 4.8 (2403 votes)

Accident Waiting to Happen 4.5 (3253 votes)

Breaking the Law 4.3 (3255 votes)

Cat-Astrophe 3.4 (3529 votes)

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