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The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. |
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(2001, Florida) A stretch of road in Clearwater dubbed the "Miracle Mile" carries three times its designed load of traffic. A few years ago I was approaching a green light at a busy intersection on the Miracle Mile when I noticed a fire engine, lights flashing and sirens blaring, trying to cross against the light. People were whizzing by, oblivious to the fire engine, and preventing it from crossing. I don't know how they overlooked it -- presumably they just chose to ignore it. If an emergency vehicle were responding to something involving me, I'd want it to have nothing but clear road, so I always give way. I pulled up to the crosswalk and stopped, despite the green light. Traffic continued to whiz past me on both sides, ignoring the fire engine sitting at the intersection awash with lights and sirens. A guy in a white Lexus nearly rear-ended me, and as he gingerly nosed his way back into the traffic that was whizzing by, he locked eyes with me and gave me a single finger salute, holding eye contact until he was completely past me. He faced forward just in time to see the fire engine smack in front of him. It had finally fought its way into the middle of the intersection. I'd have liked to stay and witness his ignominy, but instead I waved cheerfully and drove off, leaving him to explain to police and a dozen unhappy firemen, how he could miss a forty-foot bright-yellow fire truck with a shrieking siren and enough lights to outshine a Christmas tree. Unfortunately he didn't quite win a Darwin Award.
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
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Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest
Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.$15 The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is. Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head! 123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more. Autographed by Author! |
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