Submissions

Regarding the whackjob who set off a bomb in his lap on a plane 12/2009: Yes we see the irony. However, this person's actions were not merely stupid -- they were deliberately harmful. He was on a suicide mission, and his explicit goal was to kill the innocent people around him, while creating widespread fear. The Darwin Awards recognizes actions that are whimsically and stupendously foolish, but we DO NOT condone actions that are evil, or injure others, nor do we further the aims of people who seek publicity in this manner. Thanks but no thanks.

Do you have a Darwin Award Nominee in mind?  Here's your chance to place a worthy contender before the public eye. First make sure your story adheres to the Rules.  Then search the website and Slush Pile (below) to make sure it hasn't been submitted yet.

Just a Dumb Criminal, with no death-or-near-death experience?
Submit at DumbCrooks.com

Please don't skip the search! Once you're sure it's new, submit the story using the form below. If you DON'T search the website first, DO report to your nearest coffee shop INSTEAD of using the form below.

Ready to make your Nominee famous?
Write it up!  Even better than an exact copy of the news report!  The creative reader is encouraged to take a stab (heh heh) at writing the story in faultless wry prose.  Roll up your sleeves, warm a beverage, and spend time describing the nomination.

Your insights help me write a better story.  And Slush Pile readers especially appreciate submissions that are rewritten to highlight the evolutionary aspect.

Extract relevant details from the source (and your memory) and explain the circumstances in full Darwinian glory.  A man may fall into a pit of raw sewage, but it's up to you to point out that he was juggling beers on a catwalk over the tank.

Once your nomination is submitted, it will be reviewed by a panel of volunteer moderators who will either promote it to the Slush Pile or explain why they didn't. Once it's in the Slush Pile, its popularity is gauged by reader votes. Eventually I winnow out the "fittest" Slush Pile contributions to write into Darwin Awards and add to the permanent archive.