(19 May 2014, Arizona) The mummified remains of a man discovered in a Tucson manhole tell their own poignant story. In May the manhole was opened to investigate a fluctuation in electrical power. According to records kept by Tucson Electric Power the manhole had not been opened in the past five years, so the team that entered the underground high-voltage vault was quite surprised to find the dessicated remains of a man slumped near cut copper wires. In his shriveled hand was -- can you guess? -- a bolt cutter.
Crime pays so little, and costs so much. This nominee not only failed and fried but also, nobody noticed, making his death both stupid and sad. An autopsy confirmed the obvious conclusion that electrocution was the likely cause of death. The date of death was set at somewhere between one and two years previous to the discovery.
The mummy was carrying ID for a 51-year-old man, and DNA testing is underway to verify the identiy of the crispy copper critter.
What Readers ThinkMichael W. (FB) says, "He was de-lighted."
Frank S. (FB) says, "How re-volting."
Jon W. (FB) says, "Too obvious to say he wasn't much of a bright spark."
Alfred M. (FB) says, "Some might say he was a dim bulb, but I imagine
Ronald T. (FB) says, "It does sound like a good example of a crime