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2007 Darwin News
Crutch, Meet Crotch
The Enema Within
Falling in Love
Support Group
Weight Lift
A Cow-ardly Death
Beer for Bears
Stop. Look. Listen.
A Prop-er Sendoff
Oil Tank Trampoline
Elephants Press Back
The Alchemist
Barn Razing
Electronic Fireworks
Timing is Everything
Descent of Man
Sky Surfer
The Laptop Still Works!
Fatal a-Traction
Four Great Ideas
Fatal Foaming Action
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2007 Darwin Awards
Honoring Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool--by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

Stop. Look. Listen.  
2007 Darwin Award Winner
Confirmed True by Darwin

Rare Double Darwin.

(12 September 2007, Florida) A woman wins two concert tickets from a local radio station. The Dave Matthews Band, live! She can't believe her luck. She invites her friend to join her, but they are in for more than a concert experience.

Flash forward to the next morning. My buddy, head of operations at the amphitheater, looks like hell. He tells me that two women were killed the previous night at the concert. I am shocked. Nothing like this has ever happened at the amphitheater. I ask for details.

Flash back to the previous evening, 8:30pm and pouring rain. The show is delayed. Two women leave the venue to escape the rain. They pass multiple free shuttle buses that run directly to the parking lot. Instead, they opt for a shortcut across a 7-lane Interstate.

They run a hundred yards through wet grass and jump a six-foot fence that borders the road. Ahead are 3 lanes of freeway traffic, a 100' median, and another 4 lanes of traffic. Beyond that is another six-foot fence, the maze of an 'under construction' garage, and a long hike around a casino.

All in all, the 'shortcut' to their vehicle covers a distance of half a mile. And the women are in a torrential thunderstorm. Free shuttle bus, or mad dash across dangerous territory?

My buddy was an eyewitness when the first vehicle struck the women at 8:30 pm. Oddly, this was in the first lane of traffic, on a straightaway where one can see headlights for miles in either direction. The impact hurled the women farther into traffic, and each was struck by a second car. They did not survive the collisions.

Ironically, one of the women was an "energetic and gifted athlete" who won two national championships in gymnastics. Physical prowess is no substitute for the homespun maxim:

"Stop. Look. Listen. Or tomorrow you'll be missing."

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