The Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2002 Darwins
Shoot 'em Off
Faulty Aim Fatal
What's That Sound?
Firecracker Chainsaw Massacre
Tied Off
Human Torch
Wounded Wire Bites Back
Bees 1, Humans 0
Border Crossing
Wrong and Wronger
Chainsaw Insurance
Slip Sliding Away
The Worm Has Turned
Return to Trees Fails
Sneakers
Saw a Grenade
Caveat Emptor
Rocket Tester
Truck Stop
Romanian Trains
Losing Face
Jet Taxi
Booby Traps Trap Boob
Well-Trained
I Can't Swim!
Fir Tree Trimmer
Daredevil
Blowhole
A Rocky Roll
Mechanic Mayhem
Depth of a Fisherman
Other Darwin Years 
2014 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 1998 1997 1996 1995 1994 Vintage
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2002 Darwin Awards
Email a Friend Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. NextPrev Random

 
 
Chainsaw Insurance
2002 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

(January 2002, Italy) A violent attack on an innocent man? Andreas, a 23-year-old ex-bouncer from Italy, was found lying in a pool of blood near a country road. Police initially mistook him for a victim of sadistic mutilation. His left leg had been nearly severed by a chainsaw. His last act was an emergency call to operators who heard only a "death rattle." By the time help arrived, copious bleeding had drained his body of blood.

Sad plight? Not quite.The incredible truth was far odder.

Andreas had conspired with his cousin in an insurance scam. The 29-year-old accomplice confessed that he was the "assailant" who attacked--and inadvertently killed--the younger man in a mutually planned insurance fraud that went badly awry.

Andreas had convinced his cousin to cut his left leg off with a chainsaw in order to reap nearly a million dollars from numerous insurance policies. Permanent disability was all that was required. Andreas relied on his cunning, and his knowledge of first aid, to survive the chainsaw incident.

The attack took place near a country lay-by. The cousin sawed Andreas' leg below the knee, and severed a major artery in a gambit timed too close for survival. Emergency crews arrived to find Andreas dead and his cousin fled, tossing the chainsaw in a river on the way out of town.

The cousin now languishes in a cell on homicide charges. Andreas' death was a classic example of fate noticing those who buy chain saws.

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2012
Submitted by: Diego Vignola, Alison Gray, Simone Turano

Previous Directions Next

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend