The Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
1999 Darwins
Living on Zionist Time
Fatal Footsie
Gone Fishin'
Hurricane News Junkie
Copper Caper
Darwin Awards Shorts
Burmese Python
Sink the Cue Ball
Dead Spitter
Up In Smoke
The Winner Gets... a Post Mortem
Firefighters Ignite!
The Bumbershoot
Smarter Animals
Flames of Passion
Go Speed Racer Go
Peeper Plummets
Roller-Coaster
Shell Shot
Intelligence Blunders
Walking on Water
Dum Dum Boutique
Snake Charmer?
Lights Out
What's New Pussycat?
Laughing Gas
Yosemite Hike
Maine Chainsaw Romance
Resistance is Futile
Breatharianism
Rob Your Neighbor
Love Crushed Sex
Wet Will He
Good Trumps Evil at Church
Power of Satan?
Mental Eclipse
Liposuction Tragedy
Sex and Suffocation
Hard Work Rewards
Wild Animal Lesson
Stay With the Herd!
Ur-inate-iot
Fatal Footwear Fashion
Yosemite Parachute Safety
Killer Whale Rodeo
Wiped Out
Avoiding a Fight
That Sinking Feeling
Show Off
Poisonous Pets
Sleepfalling
Sauna Kills Monk
Silenced by the Lambs
Paragliding vs. Parasailing
Other Darwin Years 
2014 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 1998 1997 1996 1995 1994 Vintage
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
1999 Darwin Awards
Email a Friend Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next
Prev
Random

Dead Spitter 
1999 Darwin Award Nominee
Unconfirmed by Darwin

(15 July 1999, Alabama) A 25-year-old soldier died of injuries sustained from a 3-story fall, precipitated by his attempt to win a high-altitude spitting contest. The "former" military specialist had a blood alcohol level of 0.14%, paving the way for a well-earned Darwin Award.

He was so intent on victory - and so drunk - that he attempted to employ a dangerous and hitherto-untested technique to add momentum to his saliva. The contender backed away from the window, then hurled himself towards the metal balcony rail while expectorating.

In a tragic miscalculation, his momentum carried him right over the railing, which he grasped fleetingly before plummeting 24' to the concrete below.

There is no report on the status of the payload expelled into the night sky.

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2012
Submitted by:
Curtis Salisbury
Reference: Fort Hood Sentinel

Ethan Vessels says, "The story of the spitter is true. However, it was not Fort Rucker but Fort Huachuca, Arizona in 1998. The deceased was atteng a Basic Training course. You can call the military police station and ask them to confirm it. The brass tried to keep it quiet so as not to ruin his funeral."

Previous Directions Next

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend