The Darwin Awards 

Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2001 Personals
Miracle Mile
Medical Misadventures
Tube Snake
Parachute Catch
Horsing Around
Monkey Business
Regular & Extra Crispy
Fleas of Fire
Real Science
Flat Fix Fizzles
Got a Match?
Uncle Rick's End
Power Over Plate Glass
Accident Prone
Workin' on the Railroad
Theoretical Knowledge
Other Personal Years 
2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 Vintage
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum


2001 Personal Accounts
The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. Next Prev Random


Theoretical Knowledge
2001 Personal Account

(April 98, Canada) Some people talk smart but act like future Darwin Award winners. I had just emerged from my high school chemistry class, not my best subject. On my way to the cafeteria, I was joined by Mr. Junior Einstein, who was happily spouting chemical gibberish. He began pontificating on the reactions caused by adding heat to certain elements such as neon and aluminum. Once we reached the cafeteria, he nonchalantly placed his food in the microwave oven. As it cooked, Einstein explained that aluminum can explode when heated sufficiently. As he talked, I began to detect the faint scent of smoke in the air, which I mentioned to my guest lecturer. As we turned towards the microwave, his jaw dropped low enough to accommodate a rack of test tubes. His dish of food was blazing. One second later the oven was rocked by a loud Kablaam! This candidate for an At-Risk Survivor suddenly discovered that theoretical knowledge does not equal practical wisdom. The chemistry lesson he learned in the cafeteria was far more valuable: "Don't mix aluminum foil with heat!" © 1994 - 2020
Submitted by: Alex Brovedani

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
Previous Directions Next

Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend © 1994 - 2022