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Darwin Awards
2008 Darwin Awards
Email a Friend Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

Low Flying Drunk
2008 Darwin Award Nominee
Unconfirmed by Darwin

(1996, Canada) Sleeping residents of Chilliwack were awakened early one morning by the sound of a small aircraft flying lower than usual. The engine noise was like a mosquito, zooming too close too quick, then veering away. What the bleep was going on?

In the wee hours of the night, during a bout of heavy drinking, two future Darwin Award nominees concluded that, with neither had a pilot's license nor flight training, they nevertheless knew enough to pilot an aircraft. knew all they needed to know to at a local dive, They drew the obvious conclusion, and decided to take a plane from the small local airport for a drunken joyride over the city. They invited two females along for the ride; fortunately, the level-headed ladies declined.

From idea to execution, the plan evolved quickly. One of the gentlemen worked at the airport and had access to the tarmac. The two men then managed to unlock a plane and get it off the ground and into the sky. They went on to buzz around in the dark, skimming above the roofs of the houses. This went on for an extended period of time.

Eventually they decided to land. They attempted to land on the grassy median between east and west-bound lanes of the Trans Canada Highway. They almost made it under the electrical wires that cross the median. Almost. Where these wires were concerned, fate intervened. Instead of making a soft landing on the grassy verge, the tail clipped the wires, sending the aircraft diving nose-first into the ground and killing both occupants.

Only then were the sleepy Chilliwack residents able to return to their REM sleep.

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DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
Reference: Uncited edition of the newspaper, Chiliwack Progress

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