The Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2004 Darwins
Rutting Contest
Man Drowns in Kitchen Sink
Spy vs. Self
Do-It-Yourself Landmine
4-1-0 Club
Stepping Out
Watch Out for That Tree!
Bannister to Heaven
Aim to Win
Hold That Bus!
"Who Wants Summa This?"
Right Over the Dam
Terminal Creativity
Tree vs. Man
Chicken to Go
Cold Call
The Army's a Blast
Homemade Wine
Dope on a Rope
Damned if You Do...
Flying Dutchman
Tunnel Vision
Lava Lamp
Snake Man
Daring Feet
Amateur Bomb Inspector
Closer Look at Victoria Falls
Other Darwin Years 
2014 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 1998 1997 1996 1995 1994 Vintage
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2004 Darwin Awards
Email a Friend Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

 
 
Damned if You Do...
2004 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

(6 September 2004, Romania) A Pitesti man with a metal ring stuck on his penis was being sought by doctors, after he fled the hospital consumed by panic.

The unidentified 42-year-old said he put the ring on his penis after losing a bet during a drinking game at a pub. He was subsequently unable to remove the ring. Embarrassment kept him from seeking immediate medical help, but after two days, unbearable pain overcame unbearable shame, and he took his smelly and discolored member in for treatment.

Doctors told him the bad news.Gangrene had set in, and his life was in danger. The blood supply had been cut off for too long, and there was nothing they could do but remove his penis, so that the necrosis did not spread to the rest of his body.

The manhunt was ongoing. "There is no way he can escape going under the knife," said a doctor. "He must come back to the hospital and accept this." The man's only consolation is a guaranteed Darwin Award, one way or the other!

A reader writes in to say, "NOT TRUE! Some of us naturally 'little guys' have managed to have a kid or two, with a little creativity and medical intervention. Surgically cutting a tendon over the penis gives and extra inch, or more."

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2012
Submitted by: Bradley F.
Reference: Daily Record (UK), Ananova

Previous Directions Next

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend