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(September 1998, Idaho) A few people out cow-tipping made so much noise
that they woke the farmer. The farmer came running out with a shotgun
loaded with rock salt, yelling, "Get out of my fields!" One interloper
yielded to an impulse to drop his pants and moon the farmer, offering a
bright target in the dark night. The farmer took aim with his shotgun, and
pegged him in his butt and testicles!
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SIDEBAR: Cow tipping is an
activity in which members of our species attempt to prove their
superiority over a "lesser" species by sneaking up on an unsuspecting
cow sleeping on a hillside, and pushing her over. Laughter ensues
among the triumphant humans as the "inferior" animal rolls down the
hill, trying to regain its footing.
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The wounded man managed to crawl back to his car, where his snickering
friends awaited. He was in great pain, but also in great embarrassment,
and refused to go to the Emergency Room. His friends just dropped him off
at home, where he made the painful choice to soak the rock salt out in the
tub.
Eight hours later, the young man was still unsuccessful. By then his
parents had heard his muffled screams and wondered what was up. When he
finally admitted the truth, they rushed him to the Emergency Room, where
doctors removed several chunks of salt and, from what I understand, had the
best laugh. One doctor told his parents that he would never be able to
reproduce.
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2020
Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: Idaho Falls Post Register
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A Salty Tale
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