The Darwin Awards

2009 At-Risk Survivor

Next Prev Random At-Risk Survivors have misadventures that stop short of the ultimate sacrifice. Nevertheless we salute the spirit of their colossal blunders with an Honorable Mention. Better luck next time!

Boom Boom Bees
2009 At-Risk Survivor
Unconfirmed by Darwin

(1999) Our hero had just moved into a rental home. The yard had not been mowed in over a year. He set about mowing down the overgrown weeds, and soon ran right over a foot-wide hole. Out came an angry army of yellowjackets! As he ran in terror, our man knew he had to get rid of these pests somehow, and soon.

He sat on the porch pondering the problem over a few brews. As an interim solution, he poured a five-gallon jug of gasoline down the hole, then drank more beer and watched the sun set. What was the likelihood that the mission was accomplished? An hour later he decided to err on the side of caution and burn them out.

He lit a match and tossed it at the hole. Boom, and I mean KABOOM. Hair on arms? Gone! Eyebrows? Gone! Walkway? Cracked, and a six-foot crater where the wasp nest had been. As he stood there burnt and smoking, beer in hand, wife shrieking in the background, he knew he had won...the Dumb Ass Award.

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Reference: Personal Account, Bobby Sutton

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