Single Bud Vase
2009 Honorable Mention
Unconfirmed by Darwin
MEDICAL REPORT: I was a nurse on a busy surgical unit, and I received a
report that a young patient was arriving with "severe penile lacerations."
I could not imagine what this poor lad had done to injure himself. The
21-year-old patient confided that, upset by his girlfriend's unwillingness
to have intimate relations, he had romanced a flower vase. Alas, in the
heat of the moment the bud vase shattered, lacerating his penis.
He required emergency surgery. Afterward, the urologist told us that the
boy would require a catheter for weeks, and he was unsure if his mojo would
be functional. I felt sorry for the kid, but did laugh when I saw his
girlfriend walking down the hall, bringing flowers.
ORIGINAL SUBMISSION
