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Darwin Awards
2009 At-Risk Survivor
Email a Friend The stupidity displayed by the participants in the following tales stops short of the ultimate Darwin Awards sacrifice. Nevertheless, we salute the spirit and innovation of their misadventures. Next Prev Random

 
 
Popsicle
2009 At-Risk Survivor
Unconfirmed by Darwin

In the mid-eighties my father sailed on the research ship Regina Maris to study whale populations in Greenland. One night he noticed there were a lot of icebergs floating by the boat. Icebergs! After drinking several beers too many with a friend, he decided to do something stupid. A quick hop onto an iceberg proved that you could stand on it...

So my dad decided to hop from iceberg to iceberg with his friend until they reached the nearest village two miles away. Hop after hop, they made their way across the ice floe. As the lights of the village and the shoreline grew nearer, they grew colder and began to pick up the pace. Alas, in their hurry, they accidentally hopped together onto one small iceberg...

It broke under their combined weight, plunging them into the icy salt water where they quickly sobered up. After thrashing about in the ch-ch-chilly water for several interminable minutes, they managed to climb onto another iceberg, and carefully hopped the rest of the way to shore. The men limped into the village, where they were admitted to the hospital with hypothermia and a touch of frostbite. Released little worse for the wear, to this day my Dad never goes into the ocean.

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DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
Reference: Personal Account, Tucker Worrall

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The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

 

 


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