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The stupidity displayed by the participants in the following tales stops short of the ultimate Darwin Awards sacrifice. Nevertheless, we salute the spirit and innovation of their misadventures. |
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(31 July 2005, Darwin, Australia) A 30-year-old resident of this aptly
named town of 60,000, nestled in the Northern Territories on the Sea of
Timor, just wanted to go home. But he was thwarted by two circumstances.
First, he lived in an upper-level unit in a high-rise apartment building,
and second, he had locked his keys in the apartment.
It was 4am. Some people do their best thinking in the wee hours of the morning, but our protagonist was not one of them. He concluded that his best course of action was to scale the outside of the building. He managed to climb a short distance before he slipped. Luckily, a parked car was beneath him to cushion the fall. He pulled himself off the shattered windshield and, unwilling to give up after one small setback, again set out to scale the wall. This time he reached the third floor before he slipped. He was less fortunate than before, as he landed on his head, yet also more fortunate, as this knocked him unconscious and saved him from a third attempt. He survived the fall, and was taken to Royal Darwin Hospital for treatment. Lest outsiders get the wrong idea of Darwin, Australia, we include a comment from a sergeant on the Darwin Police force: "It doesn't happen every day," he said.
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2008
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Visit the Darwin Awards Giftshop Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest
Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.$15 The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is. Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head! 123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more. Autographed by Author! |
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