|
(August, various years, Pennsylvania) Every summer, the Society for
Creative Anachronism holds a two-week-long "war" in rural Pennsylvania. The
Darwin Awards team loves SCA members for their welcoming enthusiasm and
their passion for medieval history and arts both fine and martial. But as
with any large organization, there are always a few outliers! And at an
event the size of Pennsic, which attracts over 10,000 attendees from around
the world, there are bound to be some potential Darwin Award winners
running around. For example:
The saying goes, fighters have two neurons, one is lost and the other is
out looking for it. A knight fell "dead" (i.e., passed out) on the
battlefield after a minor body blow. When he came to, it was revealed his
appendix had been removed just last weekend, and he was still "stapled
shut" from surgery. Please, hide your knight's helmet if he intends to
endanger himself. Protect your fighters!
A woman was taken to the camp's medical facility with heat exhaustion
verging on heat stroke. Attempts to lower her temperature failed. Finally
the EMTs removed her clothing to apply ice. Beneath her elaborate historic
dress, they found that she was wrapped neck to ankles in plastic wrap --
perhaps in order to lose weight? Removing the plastic wrap brought her
temperature under control. Remember, ladies: Your date wants to stroke you,
not plastic!
When the damp weather made it hard to get a campfire started, a knight
suggested using a capful of white gas. His squire heard "cupful" and poured
on two. The fumes became a situation. The knight, a real-life munitions
expert, said, "We've got to burn it to defuse it." One match
later...WHOOMPH! A 14-foot column of hot fire was the result. The mushroom
cloud could be seen a mile away. An actor in a nearby play glanced
offstage, then hollered, "Fire!" to the crowded theater. The squire is
restricted from using accelerants henceforth.
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2012
Reference: Wendy "Darwin" Northcutt
|
Medieval Mayhem
Next
