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The stupidity displayed by the participants in the following tales stops short of the ultimate Darwin Awards sacrifice. Nevertheless, we salute the spirit and innovation of their misadventures. |
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(10 December 2004, Washington) Not far from the Eastern Washington State
Hospital for the mentally handicapped, Zach, an 18-year-old "A" student in
gun safety classes, decided to impress his girlfriend with his coyote
hunting skills. He needed a live chicken as bait. So, girlfriend in one
hand and .22 caliber rifle in the other, he entered the butchering barn
where carefree chickens roamed.
You never know how mixing testosterone, chickens, and guns will turn out. There are so many variables. Zach swung the rifle at a fluttering fowl, but the rafters got in the way. The gun butt hit the ceiling and discharged, sending a bullet into his right forearm and out the elbow. He didn't realize he had shot himself until he noticed his right hand twitching, and took his coat off for a closer look. Zach shared the lesson he learned: "To know you shot yourself and came close to dying, it's a pretty scary deal. You've gotta be careful with guns."
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The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action
Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.$15 185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...! This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone. Autographed by Author! |
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