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2014 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
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Crispy Crooker

2014 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Most people learn early on in their life that electricity plus a human body equals bad. This is usually taught to us by mom, dad, labels on electronic equipment or touching something that has electricity through it (such as an outlet, electric fence or something else that conducts electricity). Usually, this is enough to deter people from touching anything electrical without shutting the power off first. There are some idiots, however that still elect to brave the risk to steal copper wire. This is a story of someone who went above and beyond to take the name “crispy crooker” to a whole new level. At approximately 4:30AM on June 18, 2014 near Issaquah, Washington, firefighters and King County Sheriffs were called to a report of a burglary and fire at a power substation. A man had elected to try and steal copper wire from a transformer located in the substation; which he most likely wanted to sell for a profit. After cutting a hole in the fence, and ignoring the warning signs which told him that there was electricity in the substation (it’s a power substation, idiot!), he proceeded to cut the copper wire…SIZZLE! The result was burns over 60% of his body.

This guy ignored obvious warning signs that there was live electricity in the substation; not to mention common sense (what the hell did he think was in the substation; an unpublished Shakespeare play?), not to mention knocking power out to 2,800 people. The lesson here is; do not steal copper wire, or you might end up just like this guy.

This moron got burned from 60-70% of his body, so he may still earn a Darwin Award.

Submitted on 06/18/2014

Submitted by: Philip Siegfried
Reference: http://www.komonews.com/news/local/-Intruder-shocked-burned-at-Renton-substation-thousands-lose-powe

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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
It's been a while since we've had a crispy copper crook caper for Darwin to peruse. Thanks, Philip!

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Crispy copper copping crook! Thanks Philip!

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