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Darwin Awards
2013 Slush Pile

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Rum-Chugging Man Dives For Keys

2013 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

A South Florida man in a gesture of chivalry dived into a Miami Beach storm drain to retrieve the keys of a woman who had dropped them and subsequently fell into the drain. Beforest performing this noble act, Mr Branderberg wisely considered it might be quite chilly in the waters so he drank half-a-bottle of rum and smoked a cigarette telling witnesses it was to keep warm in the cold water.

He reportedly dived down twice searching for the keys, each time smoking another cigarette for more warmth. Not ascending the third time, 911 was called.

While this would have made for quite an interesting Darwin Award involving chivalry (as well as special mention for donating his body to the sealife), rescuers were able to retrieve his body from a nearby manhole and resuscitate him. So regrettably, he only qualifies for an Honorable Mention.

Submitted on 05/01/2013

Submitted by: David Chubrick
Reference: Washington Post (AP Story) - 5/1/13

Copyright © 2013 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
This is enough of a twist on all the other stories we have involving people drowning in sewers, storm drains, etc. so I'm willing to accept it. Thanks, David!

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
I'm still getting over that he drank the rum (strong stuff) before going down. That's just asking for trouble. Thanks, David!

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