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2011 Slush Pile

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emergency room emergency!

2011 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

several years ago, a physican friend, was working the emergency room at downtown detroit's Receiving hospital. a male was brought in with a closed end wrench around his blackening erect penis. he told the attendants that he thought it would be new experience masturbating with a box wrench rather than the usual handiwork. as he became more excited the erection induced by increased blood flow caused the wrench to become a closed valve blocking the return flow of the the blood that had created the erection. after many hours and no return to flaccidity, he went to the hospital. the medics were were stumped, even resorting to fetching the head of maintenance to weigh the possibility of sawing or otherwise mechanically removing the wrench; it was determined the permanent injury probability was too great. suddenly, an intern came up with the

bright idea of lancing the swollen member and draining it of the blood and sliding off the offending tool; done, with the wound repaired with two quick stitches, and the threat of gangrene avoided,our hapless masturbator left the hospital, grateful, with with his own tool, sore, stitched, aching but otherwise intact soon to be useful again!

Submitted on 03/18/2011

Submitted by: jim lark
Reference:

Copyright © 2011 DarwinAwards.com

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>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
OUCH!!! That's about all I have to say. Thanks, Jim.

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
A box wrench...? Oh....

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