I work for the local fire dept and have seen my share of Darwin Award winners....This one will always stick with me however. Rolled on a call of what was thought to be a suicide when an apartment manager opened the door to one of his renters at the request of family to check on a guy living there who hadn't been heard from in two days.

We got there and entered the house to discover a man hanging from a ceiling fan, he had his pants around his feet and his hand was still gripping his favorite body part. Apparently he had heard that choking yourself while masturbating would make the orgasm better and had decided to try it out. What got us was his feet were on the floor, legs bent at the knees, all he had to do to save himself was stand up but apparently he really wanted that Darwin Award. The guy was named Brian, 23 years old, unmarried.

Another Darwin Award winner I would like to mention: Drano Man. Guy tried to rob a local liqueur store by threatening; "I'll drink this Drano in your store if you don't give me some money." The store worker declined, the man apparently felt that, having made the threat, he was obliged to follow through on it. All we could do by the time we rolled up was watch him choke to death on his dissolved bodily fluids. This man was named Steve, 32 years old, unmarried.

Submitted on 11/25/2008

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: Bakersfield, CA 2002

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I'd argue that the first story is a bit too common. Lots of folks try to achieve a choking high by tying a rope around their neck and some object then leaning on it, only to pass out and choke to death as a result. However the image you provided when you discovered him is somewhat cartooney. The second story is much better though. If only more crooks attempted robberies in this manner I think the police departments across the country would soon find themselves with a lot of free time on their hands. Thanks for the stories!

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I agree with Bruce! And this a great write up!

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