I was living in a rural town in Minnesota, the kind where everybody knows everybody. I lived in a townhouse complex that was set up like a square with the parking lot in the center. It was the summer of 2002 and there was a lice epidemic going on with the kids who lived there. I was close friends with my next door neighbor, Alecia, who upon finding two nits in her daughters hair took two days off of work and went on a lice killing cleaning frenzy. After she finished delousing her house she had a box of lice shampoo left over and decided to bring it to our neighbor Pam (Mortenson) since she didn't have much money and she and her 3 kids all had lice pretty badly.

When Alecia got to Pam's house to give her the shampoo she was having a conversation with another neighbor, Billy (Schwanke), who was telling her that if you put gasoline in your hair that it will not only kill the lice, but they will fall right out when you rinse rather than having to go through all the hair with a fine tooth comb and pick them out. Anyone who has treated lice before knows what a daunting task that is! Alecia warned them it was not a good idea and gave Pam the shampoo. When Alecia got home she called me up to tell me what Pam and Billy were planning, and how stupid their idea was. After she finished the part about Billy telling her to use gasoline in her hair I decided to just go next door and talk to her, but the second I opened my door I saw the ambulance at Pam's house.

I ran into Alecia's saying the paramedics were there, and we both immediately feared the worst for Pam's 7 year old daughter who had lice the worst of the bunch. We ran over to see what had happened and they wheeled a very very blackened Pam out on a stretcher. She was airlifted to Hennepin County Medical Center (about 2 hours by car) where she spent months getting skin grafts for third degree burns to her head, face, neck, hands, and lower arms.

Pam's story when she got back was that as Billy rubbed the gas in her hair it just ignited, by static electricity or something, but I heard from a friend of the family that she had lit a cigarette but felt to stupid to tell anyone about that part.

Billy also received third degree burns to her5 hands and lower arms. To put the icing on the cake, once Pam had ignited, right in front of her 3 kids, Billy didn't try to put her out, but instead ran to another neighbor's house screaming "Pam's on fire!". Pam tried to wrap a rug on her head to smother the flames, which didn't work, so she then got a brand new gallon of milk from her fridge and dumped it over her head, finally dousing the fire out!

So remember if you ever get lice, just take the time to pick the damn things off you head please!

[Personally identifying information deleted]

Submitted on 06/10/2008

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: personal account

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
As a personal account I'll gladly vote to keep this. Yet another example of the mistaken belief that gasoline can solve all your woes. Thanks!

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
A good PA...painful to read, but mighty funny! Thanks!

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