Anyone knows the hazards of swimming in Lake Superior. No one does this without a wetsuit. Also, if anyone is doing any activity like bouldering near the lake, one does it with proper safety equipment – falling in from any height might mean never resurfacing as the water is so cold. It barely gets to 42 degrees in mid summer.

Bearing these facts in mind, why would anyone take a dare from a friend to follow them along a concrete wall with the lake several feet below where the ledge tapers in from the outermost reach of the wall back to shore? I still don’t have an answer to that question but I did this very thing.

My roommate at KI Sawyer AFB, one Sgt. David Damp, Fire Control Specialist, talked me into going with him. He points down to the walkway which is like a sidewalk at the outermost reach of the break wall but says NOTHING about how scary it gets closer in to shore.

“Gosh Dave, thanks for inviting me along. I’m glad you want me to have fun," was a bit glib of me at the time but I was about to find out how afraid I could become.

As one moves along the wall, balance has to be perfect even at the widest point of the walkway. As we got along to the point where the balls of my feet were begging for support that wasn’t friggin’ there, I got a fantastic understanding of fear. I looked to my right at Dave, who at this moment looks like John Candy to Steve Martin in the opposite-traveling-trucks scene of ‘Planes, Trains and Automobiles.’ Fun hell, I’m wondering to this day how psycho this guy really was. In thinking of this I believe he was hoping I fell in the lake. There was no way he could jump in to assist as he’d freeze also.

This meant keeping one’s balance even MORE than perfect for another 30 feet or so, which at this point looked to me like 2 bloody miles.

KI was closed in 1993; I was stationed there in the Navigation Systems Shop from 1976 to 1978. So, I obviously survived as I’m writing this for your enjoyment.

I’ve been very good at finding accounts of others but decided recently I’m going to write up my experiences along the “Darwinian Competition” theme – Wendy was rather candid about one of hers so what’s good enough for Darwin is good enough for me.

This is the first of several which are really quite funny now, some of which were downright frightening at the time.

I should mention one thing: Dave is an accomplished boulderer and as I understood it quite better than an amateur climber. He invited me to go bouldering with him after this … I respectfully declined.

Submitted on 03/31/2008

Submitted by: Mike Durthaler
Reference: None -- My own personal account.

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
That sounds like one nasty tightrope walk you made. I'm glad you showed enough intelligence to decline the bouldering invite. Thanks, Mike!

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I was at Great Lakes NTC right before I went to Northwestern University. We were on opposite ends of Lake Michigan, but I can certainly agree with you on how cold it is year round! As for the virtual tightrope walk you were suckered into, yes...it could have ended with you as an ice cube, but thankfully it didn't! Greta write-up; keep 'em coming!

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