Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2008 January Slush
(UL)Roping A Deer
(Hmmm)Tiger, not lion, kills 1, injurs 2
(DA)Slippery When Wet
(DA)Pulled into the abyss
(Hmm)White Spirit IS Flammable
(?)VA Man Shot to Death While Beating
(DA)Not a Shred of Sense
(DA)Chest Piercing Electrocution
(?)Un-happy slapper
(?)Need for Speed
(?)Great Balls of Fire!
(?)Had big balls.
(?)Rich and Overconfident
(DA)Sneaking Across
Conveyor belt outlasts runner
(?)Let Me Get a Better Look!
(DA)A series of Im-Pined Events
(HM)Home Made IED
(?)Graffitists drown in storm drain
Skier dies after triggering avalanc
Do-I-Yourself Shock Therapry
MANS BEST FRIEND???
Rafts, Rivers, Cement and Bridges
Woman attacked twice by shark
Picnic Lunch
Holy Flaming DOH!
gangsta guns & fireworks don't mix
The high cost of gas
Police: Man Shot Himself In Genital
Auger to Heaven
Drunken driver saves beer
(NO)Disabled man turned himself into hu
Miami of Ohio University...
(?)Jumbolair Airborne BMW
Fire up the BBQ !
(several)
Man stabs self while fleeing
The Faster Method
Kinky Sex, Shocking Death
highway worker nearly earns award
Reverse Mohawk
1 shoot closes slaying case
Grafitti Vandals Drown
When Couch Potatoes Take Root.
two for one
dangerous mixture
Is half a Darwin better then none?
Do Tell
Drowned pair 'spraypainting inside
Man Shot Himself In Genitals During
Explosive Military Intelligence
Men shoot themselves in tattoo atte
Making Deadly Gas at Home
German man goes out with X-mas Tree
vodka+viagra death
Fake hanging becomes all too real
Death by Exploding toilet
Down the drain!
Pneumatic Nail Gun Surprize
One sleeper too many on rail tracks
Man Killed in Backyard Explosion
What was he doing up in that crane?
Semi-Conductor
That is one Fowl Shot
diver drowns for golf balls
Metal fence gets revenge
Burning Pants
Police Break in?
Killer Drill
Go Get the Lawnmower
Next Time Buy a Ticket!
dumest showoff driver ever
Couldn't wait to get down and party
Truck-a-Luck
dangerous dog food
They Ain't no Bo and Luke Duke!
The Blue - Handed Pikeman
Un-happy slapper
Driver found unbuckled in crash, bu
Man Shot Himself In Genitals During
He now hates that 'Tom Tom' GPS!!!
A Crocodile Poacher gets scrambled.
Bare hand versus table saw
Drunken Phone Repair
Knife thief stabs self during getaw
Belly dancing through traffic
Who knew trucks were heavy?
Man held by ankles to snap photo
Super Glue Eye Drops
Eagle explosion
Cutting up a Napalm Bomb
Escalator Misused
Flash Powder near miss
Log Jamming
Driver requires GPS Train-ing
elevator surfer
Two men dead after swimming in drai
New year buffaloe ride
freek accident
Rest in Peas
Bike VS. Train
Is Arthur still going to heaven?
Slow Learner
Hangings should never be mocked up
Strong finger for firing a pistol
unsuccessful robber shoots self in
The Death of Deadtown
Don't want to fall out of this bed!
Abused car strikes back
Goat Overcomes Man
New years Nose Ring In Brain
Dog Love
Homosexual Couple Hospitalized
Listen to your parents!
Run over getting the bins in
Man breaks neck in pool accident
Older Slush 
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Need for Speed

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Darwin says, "Kids hotrodding are not really dumb or astounding enough to merit that most ignoble of prizes, the Darwin Award."
Verbatim from Gainesville Sun 1/28/08 p. 1B Title: Before dying in crash that killed five, teen sought speeding advice Story: Ocala -- Less than 12 hours before he died, Joshua Ammirato was posting messages on an Internet message board seeking advice about how to drive his 2008 BMW M5 faster.

Ammirato, 18, logged onto M5board.com Thursday and Friday, asking other M5 drivers how to shift smoother in his 500-horsepower machine.

"The problem is when I'm going pedal to metal pushing 140 and upshifting, there tends to be thud noise with the gear change," he wrote in one post.

Ammirato and four other young Marion County men were killed at about 3:45 a.m Saturday, when the BMW M5 he was driving sailed off the end of the Greystone airstrip (!!!) in Anthony and crashed into a tree.

Messages on the board devoted to M5 enthusiasts show Ammirato logged on shortly before 10 p.m. Thursday as "AmericanM5."

"Let me say I am a beginner when it comes to high performance cars as I am only 18 so take it easy on me," he wrote.

Other members of the board expressed skepticism that Ammirato could have a car with a base price of $82,900 at such a young age, but warned him to take it easy until he gained more driving experience.

"Maybe your 2 years driving experience in your whole life is the problem," one member wrote.

"The fact that I never drove a manual car before may be true, but I've been driving for a lot longer than two years buddy," Ammirato responded.

(p. 2B) (Subtitle: Driver had car about 3 weeks)

Ammirato's M5, according to his posts, was equipped with a "sequential manual gearbox," which shifts like a traditional manual transmission, but without a clutch pedal.

Automobile Magazine has described the M5 as "a fearfully intimidating machine," with writer Michael Jordan adding "we've found that the SMG transmission...makes you feel like a victim of speed, not its master."

Ammirato told forum members he'd had the car for about three weeks. The vehicle is registered to his father, Santo Ammirato, according to the Florida Highway Patrol.

In his posts, Joshua Ammirato listed his other cars as a 2008 BMW 535i, a 2007 BMW 535i and a 2007 Cadillac Escalade. All have less horsepower than the M5.

News of Ammirato's death drew condolences from forum members on Saturday and Sunday.

"My prayers are with Josh and his family as well. Being that I am 21 and going on my second M5 I know the temptation is great and sometimes hard to handle at that age," one member wrote. [Future Darwin Award? C]

Another hoped others would learn from the tragedy.

"Truly a sad, sad event. May God be with the families and friends," the post read. "Hope that they have not died completely in vain -- that many young drivers (and their parents) will take this to heart and learn from it."

Submitted on 01/28/2008

Submitted by: (Ms.) Caron Cadle
Reference: Gainesville Sun, 1/28/08

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Chip said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Much more information for Darwin to see. Thanks, Caron


Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
We've already received numerous submissions about this story but this one does add a bit more detail, especially the arrogance of the driver involved. Thanks, Caron!


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend