Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2008 January Slush
(UL)Roping A Deer
(Hmmm)Tiger, not lion, kills 1, injurs 2
(DA)Slippery When Wet
(DA)Pulled into the abyss
(Hmm)White Spirit IS Flammable
(?)VA Man Shot to Death While Beating
(DA)Not a Shred of Sense
(DA)Chest Piercing Electrocution
(?)Un-happy slapper
(?)Need for Speed
(?)Great Balls of Fire!
(?)Had big balls.
(?)Rich and Overconfident
(DA)Sneaking Across
Conveyor belt outlasts runner
(?)Let Me Get a Better Look!
(DA)A series of Im-Pined Events
(HM)Home Made IED
(?)Graffitists drown in storm drain
Skier dies after triggering avalanc
Do-I-Yourself Shock Therapry
MANS BEST FRIEND???
Rafts, Rivers, Cement and Bridges
Woman attacked twice by shark
Picnic Lunch
Holy Flaming DOH!
gangsta guns & fireworks don't mix
The high cost of gas
Police: Man Shot Himself In Genital
Auger to Heaven
Drunken driver saves beer
(NO)Disabled man turned himself into hu
Miami of Ohio University...
(?)Jumbolair Airborne BMW
Fire up the BBQ !
(several)
Man stabs self while fleeing
The Faster Method
Kinky Sex, Shocking Death
highway worker nearly earns award
Reverse Mohawk
1 shoot closes slaying case
Grafitti Vandals Drown
When Couch Potatoes Take Root.
two for one
dangerous mixture
Is half a Darwin better then none?
Do Tell
Drowned pair 'spraypainting inside
Man Shot Himself In Genitals During
Explosive Military Intelligence
Men shoot themselves in tattoo atte
Making Deadly Gas at Home
German man goes out with X-mas Tree
vodka+viagra death
Fake hanging becomes all too real
Death by Exploding toilet
Down the drain!
Pneumatic Nail Gun Surprize
One sleeper too many on rail tracks
Man Killed in Backyard Explosion
What was he doing up in that crane?
Semi-Conductor
That is one Fowl Shot
diver drowns for golf balls
Metal fence gets revenge
Burning Pants
Police Break in?
Killer Drill
Go Get the Lawnmower
Next Time Buy a Ticket!
dumest showoff driver ever
Couldn't wait to get down and party
Truck-a-Luck
dangerous dog food
They Ain't no Bo and Luke Duke!
The Blue - Handed Pikeman
Un-happy slapper
Driver found unbuckled in crash, bu
Man Shot Himself In Genitals During
He now hates that 'Tom Tom' GPS!!!
A Crocodile Poacher gets scrambled.
Bare hand versus table saw
Drunken Phone Repair
Knife thief stabs self during getaw
Belly dancing through traffic
Who knew trucks were heavy?
Man held by ankles to snap photo
Super Glue Eye Drops
Eagle explosion
Cutting up a Napalm Bomb
Escalator Misused
Flash Powder near miss
Log Jamming
Driver requires GPS Train-ing
elevator surfer
Two men dead after swimming in drai
New year buffaloe ride
freek accident
Rest in Peas
Bike VS. Train
Is Arthur still going to heaven?
Slow Learner
Hangings should never be mocked up
Strong finger for firing a pistol
unsuccessful robber shoots self in
The Death of Deadtown
Don't want to fall out of this bed!
Abused car strikes back
Goat Overcomes Man
New years Nose Ring In Brain
Dog Love
Homosexual Couple Hospitalized
Listen to your parents!
Run over getting the bins in
Man breaks neck in pool accident
Older Slush 
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Picnic Lunch

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

I don't think this made the media, and since there was no loss of life, it would have to be a personal account, or Honourable Mention, not a full award.

I live in Canada, about 45 Minutes away from a place called African Lion Safari. One of the most interesting features of the Safari is the opportunity to drive your car through the exhibits, allowing you to see monkeys (notorious for ripping off antenae, and having sex on your car), Elephants, and even lions. Now one day, a friend of mine who works there related this story to me:

It turns out an family had decided to spend a day at African Lion Safari. they had paid the fees, and entered, along with their picnic lunch. They drove their car through the safari, amazed by all the animals. Now, the planned highlight of the trip was to be a picnic, but not just any picnic. Despite the clearly posted warning to under no circumstances get out of your car, the family had decided to share a picnic lunch with the lions. Now, the thought that they might be on the menu, had never crossed these people's minds. They thought it would be quite interesting o see lions up close, and perhaps share a quite luncheon with them. So, when they drove through the fencing around the lion exhibit, instead of slowly cruising through, they got out of the car, and began to set up their picnic blanket, all the while looking for lions to share the fine meal with. As soon as employee's became aware of this they rushed to the scene to avoid the family becoming the menu. They arrive (mercifully) before the lions, and immediantly tried to hustle the family out, before the lions figured out that they had a lovely lunch awaiting. To the workers suprise, the family was quite mad at being rushed to the other side of the fence, the children even going so far as to cry. How could the mean worker's ruin their picnic with the lions like that? No amount of talking would convince them otherwise, and the workers just had to shake their heads, at the people's complete inability to understand the danger they had been in.

African Lion Safari's website is here: http://www.lionsafari.com/attractions.asp, but I don't think this made the news.

Submitted on 01/12/2008

Submitted by: Tauchiss
Reference:

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I can only imagine how much this would have been in the press if the lions had found those loons before the park employees had. If you manage to find any mention of this in the news please do let us know!


James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
The nerve of some people! My congratulations to your quick-thinking colleagues at the park! Of course, the surviving family of these bozos would have been SURE to sue the park had anything happened! Hopefully, the next time they wish to share an intimate moment with lions, they'll do so in darkest Africa where the laws of self-selection will surely expedite the inevitable (and without all the press and stupidity-coddling)! Thanks, Tauchiss!


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend