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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Testicles & Fireworks

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

This is an exact reprint of the text of a 1993 Sacramento Bee article. Deserves an honorable mention at least, he wasn't completely successful, but came close.

SACRAMENTO BEE

July 2, 1993

ILLEGAL FIRECRACKER IN LAP INJURES MAN

Author: Jennifer Bjorhus and Kimberly Moy Bee Staff Writers

Edition: METRO FINAL Section: METRO Page: B1

Article Text:

It was the most expensive firecracker David Vasquez will ever buy.

The illegal M-100 firecracker that exploded in his lap cost him much more than the $8 he forked over for it Wednesday night.

The 20-year-old Sacramento man said he bought the firecracker from a man with a small "fireworks" sign displayed near 44th Street and Fruitridge Road.

Vasquez, driving home with a friend, said he only bought one firecracker to test it.

"It just sparked so quick I needed to throw it out the window quick," said Vasquez, recovering from surgery at UC Davis Medical Center on Thursday.

Vasquez tried to throw the firecracker out the window of his Cadillac as he drove by Scarborough and Manon ways in south Sacramento Wednesday night. But the firecracker hit the window frame at the roof and bounced back, landing between his legs.

"It backfired, as a manner of speaking," said Division Chief Don Schroeder of the Sacramento City Fire Department. "It's no laughing matter - he was seriously injured. It blew off a portion of his testicles."

The blast left a hole 5 inches deep in the car seat and cracked the windshield.

An M-100 firecracker - roughly 3 inches long and 1 inch in diameter - is equivalent to one-eighth of a stick of dynamite.

"I was sitting on it. The next thing I knew it went off," Vasquez recalled. "I jumped out of my car. It was just a really burning sensation on my thighs. My shorts were just shredded. It messed me up pretty bad."

Vasquez said, however, that he will be able to have children.

"I guess I lucked out," he said. "The doctor said I came pretty close to dying."

No charges are being filed.

Submitted on 09/11/2007

Submitted by: Tim Martin
Reference: Sacramento Bee, 7-2-1993

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

James said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
This happened a while ago but doesn't seem to be in our archives! Perhaps Darwin will remember this from day one! Anyway, thanks for digging this one up, Tim!


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
Well, it is unfortunate that the M100 only did half the job or this could be a certified DA! Thanks for sending it in, Tim


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