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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Not-So-Safe Sex

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Accepted into the archive.
Original submission (the best of six!)

Alternative title: Coming and going at the same time.

(June 2007, Columbia SC). Apparently safe sex takes on a whole new meaning when you are perched on the edge of a roof four stories in the air!

On June 20, 2007 at 5 AM a 21 year-old couple was found naked in the road by a passing cabbie. Brent Tyler and Chelsey Tubleston were unconscious with obvious injuries and were taken to the nearest hospital where, despite treatment, were pronounced dead later that morning. Authorities were at a loss to explain what had happened. There were no wrecked cars, motorcycles, or any other witnesses to what had happened – and there were no signs of their clothing! Police found clues when they searched the top of a nearby building where they located their clothes, neatly folded.

"It appears as if the two individuals were on the roof and could have accidentally fallen off the roof, onto the street," Sgt. Florence McCants said. There was no indication of foul play. (Perhaps there was indication of fore play?) The two fell about 50 to 60 feet, McCants said. Police found clothing for two people on the roof of the building at 900 Laurel Street, McCants said, and nothing else. She said police can only speculate at this point what they might have been doing on the roof… Hmmm…what do naked 21 year-old couples do at night, even if on a roof? Bowling? Waterskiing? Maybe it was strip poker and nobody won?

Quotes from the friends seem fitting: Brian Corey worked with Mr. Tyler said: “He liked the outdoors and was into fast cars. I think…it was kind of a place for him to reflect. He’s a thinker; when he has decisions to make he would take his time and think it out. He mentioned to me he had a spot that was really cool and you could see over the whole city. I’m assuming that was it.” DeAnn Morris, Ms. Tubleston’s roommate said: “She always wanted to make you feel better.”

Bottom line – if you’re going to have outdoor sex, stay away from the edge of the roof!

This is a true Darwin award trifecta: two people die at the same time, WHILE in the act of procreation, due to an astonishingly poor decision.

Submitted on 06/22/2007

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: The State Newspaper June 20 2007, Columbia SC

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

James said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Another write-up which contains even more info on our two lovebirds! Have a look, Darwin!


Bruce said:
Maybe Toss: Repeat
I don't see anthing significantly new here but I may be mistaken.


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Well, I thought I had seen the last definitive story about these two, but I like this write up. And this version does indicate the the male had been there before. Thanks for sending this version.


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