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2007 April Slush
(DA) Hold Your Horses
(PA) Cross Country Balls-up
(DA)Pull up or die
(?)Blood-thirsty man bites Viper
(?)Stamp a bomb and see what happens
(?)Carry with care
(Hmm)All I need is the air that you brea
(HM)Buffalo Stampede
(?)Cutting Edge Robbery
(?)Digging Sand
(?)Sucked the life out of himself
(?)Ball Kabob
(HM)kaboom!
(DA)Stolen Police Car
(?)Button Fly Boy
Roller Coasted
(?)Holy -blam!- the garage is on fire!
(DA)Out of Air
(HM)Shattering Stone : Broken Ego
How NOT to use a flare
Drunk Aerobatics
Meat Cleaver in Robber's Trousers
Lucky
The air in here
Boy hits overpass with head
True Love at Its Worst
Punch Drunk Party Boy!
Slippery Ending
gasoline+weed+teenager=bad day
Drunk Aerobatics Followup
Man Dies Professing His Love
woman dies after rope swing acciden
Gas and Flames Surprise
Man Dies After Flying on Plywood
Natural gas in propane container
Drunk Firefighter Has "The Agua"
Drowning rerun
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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Ball Kabob

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Darwin says, "Thanks for the submission, Mick. Painful reading, though! Ultimately, sword fighting with skewers just doesn't sound terminally stupid to me. This particular skewering was an accident, rather than a foreseeable risk."
Rustic,Colo.March 28th - When you mix four campers playing sword fighting with cooking skewers and three cases of beer bad thing are bound to happen.

While camping in the Colorado Rockies near Rocky Mountain National Park four drunken friends’ horse play escalated into a trip to the Fort Collins hospital to have Thomas Mackey’s testicle removed.

“We had been drinking most of the day”, said Pat White of Livermore Colorado.” The four of us had just gotten a little to bored and I slapped the hot dog wiener off of Tom’s cooking skewer with mine. We jumped up and started sword fighting like we were kids.”

Obviously things got a little carried away from there. Thomas lunged towards Pat as he was stabbing at him. This great mistiming lead to a skewer being driven through Mr. Mackey’s testicle.

As soon as the cursing and threats had subsided the four men made the thirty mile trip into Fort Collins where the testicle was removed.

Submitted on 04/13/2007

Submitted by: Mick Howard
Reference: 3/28/07 http://www.starcamping.com/drunk-camper-stabs-testicle-with-wiener-skewer

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
Thanks for the story, Mick. The image of drunk campers sword fighting with skewers (probably only 10 inches long or so) sure is a funny one. But since only one testicle was removed I think there's a chance this rocket scientist could still reproduce, so he only qualifies for an HM. They'll have to try harder for a full Darwin!


James said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
Nope, no bystanders here, just the Four Musketeers swashbuckling away with skewers! I can definitely visualize this! Thanks, Mick!


Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

Autographed by Author!

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