Darwin says, "Accepted into the Archive (near miss)."

www.oregonlive.com

OREGON CITY -- A Volkswagen Jetta rocketing down Oregon 212 early Monday flipped over, cartwheeled near a 100-foot cliff above the Clackamas River and smashed through the wall of a garage.

It was 2:30 a.m., and Duane Worley, 36, was asleep in an apartment attached to the garage. He got up to find the car jammed halfway through the wall, resting on its passenger side, and the air heavy with gasoline fumes.

In the back of the car, someone was rummaging around.

"There's gas, there's gas!" Worley remembers yelling.

"I need my knife!" Worley heard the figure yell back.

Worley watched as the man flicked open a lighter, apparently to see better.

The flame jumped from the lighter and -- whoosh -- spread from the backseat to the front.

Others, Worley isn't sure who, soon arrived to help.

One person grabbed an extinguisher, shattered the back window of the Volkswagen and sprayed the inside. Another yanked the driver out though the back window.

Just as the driver got out, Worley said, flames exploded, and the car kept burning until it was extinguished by firefighters from Clackamas County Fire District No. 1.

William R. Madison IV, 22, of Gresham, was treated at Legacy Emanuel Hospital for non-life-threatening burns, then cited on accusations of driving under the influence of intoxicants, reckless driving, criminal mischief and driving with a suspended license.

Madison's license was suspended after a previous conviction of driving under the influence of intoxicants, said Oregon State Police Lt. Gregg Hastings.

Witnesses told police that Madison was racing another driver, and a state trooper said Madison told him he was going more than 100 mph.

Court records indicate that Madison's criminal history includes felony convictions for robbery and kidnapping. Madison's phone is unlisted, and efforts to reach him were unsuccessful.

Damage to the garage and apartment, at 14620 Oregon 212, which is east of Southeast 142nd Avenue in the Happy Valley area, had not been assessed.

After the crash, Worley and his two teenage children went to his girlfriend's house, Worley said.

"We needed a nap."

Peter Zuckerman: 503-294-5919; peterzuckerman@news.oregonian.

Submitters Note:

Admittedly, this guy lived (for now), but this is still an excellent honorable mention.

Submitted on 01/30/2007

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: The Oregonian 01-30-2007

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Graham said:
Definitely Toss: Lacks Excellence
Here's another person who should be physically restrained from operating a vehicle! As he was smashed out of his brain, I don't recomend an award. Other moderators disagree and may give an award, even though the guy probably has no recollection of events. Thanks for sending this in.

James said:
Neutral: Honorable Mention
I like this one because it is rather funny! Smashed or not, the driver KNEW there was gas and flicked his Bic anyway. I feel rather sorry for poor Mr. Worley, who, after a rude awakening, had to witness this stupidity and the trashing of his apartment!

Jack said:
Maybe Toss: Bystanders Hurt
Sorry, but the dufus endangered Worlley and his kids. That's a no-no.

Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
"I need to find my knife!" Unfortunately this one is just an Honorable Mention. Too bad the gene pool is still at risk here. No bystanders were hurt, merely endangered. That is not a reason to toss. Jack, either you or I are mis-interpreting that rule. I am going to go right now and re-read it. You should as well. Thanks for the story, whoever you are.

Shadow said:
Maybe Toss: Bystanders Hurt
bystanders endangered... sorry

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