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Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Different Powders

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

One day when I was a kid me and my brother played hookie from school. We were extremely mischievous kids so my dad stayed home from work to make sure we didn't do anything stupid (little did he know). He said because we were sick we should stay in our rooms all day. While we were in there I remembered someone had told me that if you cut open a shotgun shell, spread out the black powder, and ignite it the powder would burn slowly. We snuck into our father's room and got some shotgun shells. Then snuck out our window and onto the front pattio. We lit the powder and it did just like we predicted. So we got more shells and made shapes with the powder on the concrete then lit them, it was intriguing. Soon we were out of shotgun shells and found some of my dad's muzzleloading powder, which at the time we didn't know was any different. Because we had a lot of it we made about a three foot spiral on the concrete with it. I had the honor of lighting it but, it didn't burn slowly instead it exploaded leaving me crispy and without eyebrows. We went back inside and tried to hide it from my father. Eventually the pain was unbearable and I had to tell my dad. My dad (who thought it's was hilarious) called my mother and she took me to the doctor. At the doctor's office I learned that if my mouth had been opened I would have died and if my eyes had not shut fast enough I would have been blind. For the next week my face was one giant blister and my hands weren't doing to good either. When I returned home and stepped through the front door my dad busted out laghing again. To this day he still gives me shit about it. The saying I heard most from him growing up was "If your gonna be dumb you gotta be tuff" followed by "and your the tuffest kid I know". Thankfully I out grew my stupidity, if I hadn't I might would have recieved a darwin award.

Submitted on 12/13/2006

Submitted by: Joe McMillian
Reference: Happened to me, Fall of 2000

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

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James said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Gadzooks, your father's reaction would be construed as child abuse by some! :-) I imagine you were too young to know the difference between slow burning and flash powder, but couldn't you have amused yourself with a nice game of solitaire instead? :-) A nice story, I'll vote to keep it!

Graham said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Amazing. Seems everyone is fascinated by gunpowder, but know so little about it. You sure had a lucky escape there!

Jack said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Even many adults fail to realize that Black Power (as used in muzzle loaders) is one of the most hazardous explosives to work with. It ranks right up there with nitroglycerin. Good story, Joe.

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