As a seasoned veteran of the Darwin Awards, I am inclined to track stupidity wherever I find it, and since stupidity is what natural selection seeks to eliminate, I thought I would throw this one into the pot!

Ever since the Chinese invented the magnetic compass circa 1200 AD, humans have endeavored to find ever more effective ways of navigating the planet they inhabit. From Mercator charts to gyrocompasses to satellite assisted navigation, we can now safely find our way nearly anywhere. The wonders of satellite navigation have now made their way into our personal vehicles. Most modern systems have a synthesized voice (usually female) which complements the screen display, and in most cases assists the driver in determining when an exit or intersection has been reached. Pretty damned amazing, says I!

Of course there are (and always will be) a few who expect technology to make up for their own lack of smarts. Technology may advance, but stupidity remains a constant. Here now a tale of one such fellow who probably didn't read the instruction manual on his new satellite navigation system. Ironically, he hails from Germany, a country responsible for much of today's technology...and also a country reknowned in past times for blind obedience to orders!

The unnamed victim from Freiberg was happily driving along, no doubt entranced by the soothing voice of his electronic navigator. Seeking a particular intersection in the town of Rudolstadt, he suddenly heard the electro-navigator's voice utter "Turn RIGHT...NOW!".

Our addle-pated motorist was about 90 feet from the intersection he sought, but somehow felt that "now" WAS in fact the time to turn. Blindly obedient to the technology to he willingly subjugated his own common sense, he turned immediately upon hearing the system. He turned onto a construction site, drove up a flight of stairs, and hit the "Port-O-Potty" at the top of said staircase.

Whether or not the contents of the Port-O-Potty emptied onto his vehicle is unknown, but damage to his vehicle and the construction site totalled $2100 Euros (about $3000, give or take). He was also fined 35 Euros.

Whether or not he felt stupid afterwards is also unknown, but his desired intersection was still there, 90 feet from where he crashed.

I nominate our driver for an Honorable Mention based on his swift and stupid decision making. In a more basic sense, he zigged when he should have zagged, and trusted technology over his own common horse sense. He was lucky this time...perhaps next time he won't be, and the moral of the story is clear: TECHNOLOGY WILL NOT MAKE UP FOR INDIVIDUAL STUPIDITY! It may delay Mr. Self-Selection from knocking but it won't prevent him from entering!

Carry on smartly, all!

Submitted on 10/24/2006

Submitted by: James G. Petropoulos
Reference: My Way News 24 Oct 2006

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

James said:
Neutral: Other
Another humble submission, fellow moderators...do be kind! :-)

Graham said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
We can only hope that these navigation systems NEVER evolve to commands such as, "UP, now!". "To err is human, not a RIGHT!" <sorry, James>

Jorge said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account

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