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Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Bushed

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Full story: http://www.gtconnect.com/articles/2006/09/23/news/community/1loc01womanfound.txt

A woman by the name of Bonnie Graham was walking on a rather civilized path through a wooded area. The civilized nature of this path is indicated by the presence of benches along it, one of which Ms. Graham was sitting on at the time she heard a noise. She feared that the noise was caused by a dangerous wild animal. Apparently believing that wild animals cannot run as fast in the dark as middle-aged women can, or that wild animals would not chase her into the woods, she began a panicked run away from the path and into the forest. As might be expected of a person fleeing in panic over rough ground at night, she twisted her ankle. Assuming, it would appear, that the unseen wild animal was still pursuing her, but that she could outdistance it by crawling (leading one to wonder whether Oregon has particularly ferocious slugs) she continued on in that fashion. In this way she penetrated, according to one rescuer, 50 to 60 yards into a thicket of blackberry bushes. And stayed there. For a week. If she had not been heard by a passing hiker, she would have eventually died there. As it was, she merely wasted a lot of people's time and earned herself a trip to the hospital ... and hopefully an honorable mention in the Darwin Awards.

Submitted on 09/23/2006

Submitted by: Jean McGuire
Reference: 9/22/2006 Corvallis Gazette

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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James said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
Wow, Jean, this brings panic to a whole new level! I could see fleeing something in the dead of night, and I can see spending the night with a sprained ankle. What I CAN'T see is staying put for almost a week! Last I checked, most wild animals hunt at night. She could have easily just grabbed the nearest dead branch and gimped to safety. I also love the write-up! This woman is REALLY WANTING in the survival instinct department, hence an HM!!!


Jorge said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention


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