Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
2006 September Slush
Blind man caught driving!!
Suggestion
Sturgeon Rough Ride
The Joys of Skitching
Tour de No Pants
Panda Bites Man, Man Bites Him
Bushed
Once is a Mistake, But Twice?
Quick Draw- Wrong Target
Keep the fighting in the Ring
Man Eats Bomb
Lost in the Outback... twice
One lucky jamoke
Is it Stuck?
The Least Compitent Criminal
Poor choice of location
exploding underwear
Walk on Water
Thats One Way to Cure It
Bumbling Brit
Grouper's revenge
Electrocuting fishes
The Headless Streaker
Mr Jiggywinkle
Mr. Electricity
Rock Solid
tight arse
Running Nowhere
Man vs. Fish, Fish wins...
Man on ATV Dies Jumping Canal
Unnatural urchin act
Maxim Dorkii
Stunt bike Taxi (Revised)
Stuck in the ventilation shaft
Run From The Tree
Locked IN the Car?
Biscycle to the nuts
Older Slush 
 
~ Randomizer ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules – Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Mr Jiggywinkle

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006430098,00.html

Once upon a time, there was a 35 year old man with premature ejaculation. Like all men with premature ejaculation does, he went off to solve his problem with a WITCH doctor. I'm assuming, at this point in time, that that's what all sensible men do.

Said witch doctor told the man that his premature ejaculation could be cured with a hedgehog, you know, 100% success rate, total discretion promised. So why not have a go.

The hedgehog was unharmed, but the man still does not know what to tell his girlfriend: “I don’t know whether she’s more likely to dump me for being some kind of pervert or for being such an idiot.”

Of course, we also have an interesting quote:

Sun Health’s Dr Keith Hopcroft says: “It’s not a treatment I’d recommend — but it could cure premature ejaculation because he’ll probably never want sex again.

Submitted on 09/18/2006

Submitted by: Tamaritha
Reference: The Sun - September 16 2006

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

James said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Thanks, Tamaritha! Your original write-up is worthy of Darwin's perusal! Although we already have this story, the extra detail (and original write-up) may make the difference between a perennial Slush-pile bridesmaid and a DA winner!

Sheryl said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Thanks, Tamaritha. While the hedgehog may have been unharmed, it certainly wasn't unarmed! I like the write up and am passing to Darwin also.

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend