When Mr. Martin Lake of Warwickshire, UK went to Australia for a vacation, was enthralled by the beauty of outback. He decided to take a stroll wearing a black t-shirt, a pair of shorts, flip-flops on the feet and a bottle of water. He probably thought there might be signs on how to get back to civilization. Perhaps he dropped bread crumbs and those nasty vultures who were following him ate them for appetizer.

Anyway, there is a glimmer of hope for Mr. Lake, as he had the mind to take a small quantity of water and a mobile phone.

After following the directions given by bushes as they swayed in the wind, he was promptly lost within a few minutes in the outback.

Our brave hero, decided that he can find his way back all alone. So he followed the nature trails for three days. Neither wearing a hat nor sunscreen, Mr. Martin turned to a shade of red between a tomato and a lobster. Running out of water, running out of juice on the mobile phone he realized his chances of getting back to civilization are very, very slim. So, after three days of fun in the Sun, he decided to call the police as the charge indicator on the mobile phone was disappearing from the LCD screen. Told the police that he does not know where he was but he is lost in the Outback.

Good Ol' Aussie police organized a search party including helicopters, police, park rangers, volunteers, aborigines, kangaroos and dingos. After searching for four hours, Mr. Martin was found sun burnt and dehydrated - lucky for him!!

The story does not end here.

Our hero stayed in the safe hands of hospital staff, recovering. May be they should have chained him to the bed or something, which they did not. While in the sick bed, he had a dream. A dream in which he lost something (probably his mind?) while frolicking in the Outback.

Once he recovered from dehydration, he changed back into his superhero costume (black t-shirt, shorts and flip flops w/o no hat or sunscreen) and decided to go find the thing he lost.

This time, he probably decided to follow the flying birds (lest he did not know that they were the vultures) and got lost AGAIN!!!

Emboldened by his previous survival and armed with his super hero costume, this time he spent 4 days in the Outback. Or perhaps his mobile phone was better charged this time. So after four days, he decided that he had had enough and called the police. This time the Good Ol' Aussie threw in a couple of emus and bird watchers in the search party as described above. They found Mr. Martin again. May be the bird watchers in the search party scouted the sky for vultures in holding pattern!!

Mr. Lake tried real hard to be nominated for the Darwin Awards. What better place than Australian Northern Territories whose capital is DARWIN!!!!

Submitted on 09/17/2006

Submitted by: Zombie
Reference: news.bbc.co.UK; 13 Sep 2006

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

James said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
I like your original write-up, Zombie, and will pass it on to Darwin for consideration.

Sheryl said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Oh, Zombie, what a brilliant write-up! A few of the animals/birds you mentioned don't, I think, exist in Australia (or particiate in searches) but I laughed out loud, especially during the second half. "Vultures in holding pattern" *laughs again*

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