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2006 July Slush
Double Darwin
Troops are thick, but this???
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fool with chainsaw
Boy Meets Cactus
What Cable?
Robber gets shot in gun store
man cuts off penis on a bet
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Rob a Gun Shop with a Knife?
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Having a Blast
Beer will kill you!
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Sleeping man rolls off cliff
dumbass climbs out on balcony
How not to fix a Jet Ski
Drive-By Firecracker
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Darwin Awards, page 175
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Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

fool with chainsaw

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

A good friend of mine, Darryl, who friends usually described as an accident looking for somewhere to happen, decided to rid himself of a 20 mtr Cypress tree. He worked his way up the trunk, removing branches as he went, tying himself to the trunk for safety. Having reached a point approxiamately 5 mtrs from the top, he decided to cut the main trunk. When the chainsaw had cut about 3/4's of the way through, the trunk split. As Darryl had tied himself to the tree with one large loop, he was slammed face first into the trunk with great force, causing him to drop the tethered chainsaw. As he was working on his own, he was well and truly stuck. He eventually managed to haul the still running chainsaw up, but instead of cutting the rest of the trunk through, he decided to cut the rope! Somehow he managed to survive the fall, was missed by the still running chainsaw and despite his best efforts, is still alive. This genius has also been trapped in a potato harvester, set himself on fire whilst welding 15 mtrs above ground and blown a car battery up in his face. Whilst still living, I feel his demise from the gene pool is only a matter of time.

Submitted on 07/29/2006

Submitted by: phil
Reference: not reported but true

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

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>> Moderator Scores <<

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
A well-written and humorous PA, made more so by the additional scrapes this fellow has gotten into! I agree, keep us posted. If he does permanently "goof", we don't want to miss it! :-)


Fitzroy said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I'm not sure finishing the tree would have been any smarter than cutting the rope, but getting into that situation in the first place certainly was stupid. This should fit right in with the other Personal Accounts.


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