Now, my mother's brake pads needed changing. They were so bad that she refused to drive her car. Consequently, Dad needed to change them, while he was taking Vicodin.

So, Dad changes the brake pads. Whenever you change your brakes, you always want to be sure that they work. Therefore, he was backing the car up to take it on a test run. He made 4 huge mistakes. His first one was that he reached down to the center console to grab his Diet Pepsi. Apparently, the steering wheel in a Neon is touchier than the steering wheel of an Escort, because him reaching down was enough to nudge the car off course enough to hit the mailbox!

That was when my dear father found his second mistake. HE HAD FORGOTTEN TO PUMP THE BRAKES!!! So, he had to frantically pump the brakes as the car continued rolling backwards. It must have been awful to hear the screeching as the car rubbed against the mailbox. When the car finally stopped, the dent was about 3 inches wide, 2 inches deep, and maybe 3 feet long.

Now, Dad's third mistake was not telling my mother immediately. She finally noticed the gouge 2 days later, in the parking lot at her area of employment. At first she thought the dent came from a hit-and-run. Thus, she began to file a police report. It finally hit her that my dad had done it after talking to him WHILE FILING THE REPORT!

And last, but not least, Dad's fourth, and final mistake, was saying to my mother (again, as she was filing the police report), and I quote, "I was wondering how long it would take for you to notice (it)." Needless to say, things were lively around the household for a few days.

The moral of the story? Don't have Vicodin in your body system when your working on cars!

Submitted on 06/15/2006

Submitted by: Emily Aubuchon
Reference: May 26, 2006

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Thanks for submitting this, Emily! The third and fourth reasons were enough for me to want to keep this as a PA! Perhaps there isn't any inherent stupidity in working on cars while on Vicodin, but not coming clean to the Mrs when you've dented her car?? BIIIIG STUUUUUPID MISTAKE! :-)

Jorge said:
Neutral: Personal Account

Jack said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
This is the first submission in quite a while that actually made me chuckle. Thanks, Emily.

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