This happened two or three years ago at my house. Let me tell you about my foster brother before I get into the story. My foster brother is a loud, obnoxious and a know-it-all braggart.

He told my brothers, Mother, and I that he drinks 'Texas Pete hot sauce' like it is water and that 'Dave's Insanity Sauce' is not that hot. (I can also drink Texas Pete from the bottle, but I knew better about Dave's Insanity Sauce)

For those who do not know about hot sauces, Dave's Insanity Sauce is so hot that in some places you have to sign a waiver to buy it. One drop can give you 2nd degree burns on you lips.

Mom had bought the bottle earlier in the day, me and my brothers tried it first before our foster brother came home. We knew from experience how hot it was and how long it took it to affect you.

My foster brother bragged he could chug the Insanity Sauce like he could chug Texas Pete. We begged and pleaded with him not to chug from the 5 oz. Insanity Sauce bottle. He chugged 2.5 ounces of it in one gulp.

I did a 5 second countdown while he had a smug look on his face.(That is how long it takes you to feel the burn.) When I hit zero his eyes opened wide and in pain on his face could be felt. He turned a bright Cherry Red color and started to sweat. He almost started to puke when my mom told him if you puke you will die of aphyxiation. He chose to not to puke.

He drank water from the kitchen faucet, but he didn't belive us that water makes the burn worse. At this point he was ghostly pale with the pain. He at cheese sandwiches, drank a gallon of milk, and ate as much chocolate as he could.(Cheese ,Milk and Chocolate usually help stop the burnng, but not with Insanity Sauce)

Dad came into the kitchen with some good/bad news for my foster brother. He told him you are going to have to wait 20 minutes for the endorphins to kick in to stop the pain. Eventually the pain did stop.

The story does not end there, for you should realize what goes in the body must come out again. He had red hot diarrhea for 2 hours the next day and even when he peed he was burning.

He is still a braggart but he learned not to mess with hot sauces.

Submitted on 08/25/2005

Submitted by: Ray Bennett
Reference:

Copyright © 2005 DarwinAwards.com

Jack said:
Neutral: Personal Account
"Dave's Insanity Sauce" does exist and does contain some of the hottest peppers known, but - while the claims of needing a waiver to buy it and giving 2d degree burns on the lips are advertising claims - I think that the story is funny enough to keep. And yes, hot sauce burns in both directions...

Kelly said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Dave's insanity can actualy kill you or put you in the hospital, depending on your system. There's a warning lable on the bottle that is ment to be taken seriously and I know of at least one individual who did have to be rushed to the hospital after ingesting it. It's potent stuff.

Tracy said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
A future DA in the making??? It's a funny story and well worth a PA

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