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I bet you...
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Darwin Awards
2005 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

I bet you...

2005 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

As we all know a great way to start a Darwin award is with the words “I bet you.” Well those words came into play about a month ago when my niece’s father (thank god he’s not my brother in-law) was offered a bet on the construction site he was working on. His own brother and a couple of their buddies bet him he couldn’t catch a circular saw one handed after he tossed it into the air. The brainiac in question was always ready to make a buck so he accepted the bet. Now the original bet was for $50. They offered to raise the bet to $100 if he would remove the safety guard. Never one to turn down a bet he promptly took the time to remove guard (which was in full working order).

So our would be winner tosses the saw up into the air and does sort of catch it. See somehow he twisted the saw around and pressed it against his body like you would a football. The part of the body he selected happened to be his groin. This is the part I am a little unsure of. See, the saw was still plugged in. I don’t know if they simply forgot to unplug it; which meant he removed the guards while it was plugged in, or if it was part of the bet. Now when he caught it his finger hit the trigger. He proceeded to cut his penis lengthwise down the middle.

I was told that when he got to the hospital he and his buddies explained the bet to the doctor. The doctor then asked them to stay in the room while he made repairs. From what I understand their stomachs did not hold out too well. The saw blade “skinned” the urethra and “destroyed” the tissue that inflates with blood that allow for erection. I have been told that although he did not loose his testicles the scar tissue was so bad that it will make an erection near impossible and at the very least excruciatingly painful. He may very well be incapable of further reproduction due to pain. He is a little touchy about the subject needless to say and would flip to find out that I submitted this. However, he’s as nice as he is smart and it all couldn’t have happened to a better guy.

Submitted on 07/16/2005

Submitted by: Jonathan Charon
Reference: June 2005

Copyright © 2005 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Kelly said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Fun with power tools.

Tracy said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Ewww - but he's already produced, so not a DA of the future

Jack said:
Neutral: Personal Account
For anything other than a PA, I'd want more information, but I'll let it slide.

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