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2005 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Ride 'em, Jeffy!

2005 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

BACKGROUND: This is a Horrible Mention, not a true Darwin award. My name is Clifton Palmer McLENDON. My e-mail address is SylviasDaddy@houston.rr.com. My stepson Jeffrey Scott BLANKINSHIP, born 20 May 1985, lives with me.

Today [Friday 8 April 2005] Jeff came limping downstairs with a large laceration on his right shin. He further informed me that his right calf was horribly swollen. He then proceeded to tell me how he got wounded:

About midnight last night, Jeff and some of his friends were out rambling. Because they were bored, they decided to relocate a portable toilet. Jeff's friends [some friends!] suggested that Jeff be the passenger. Jeff agreed. He entered the portable toilet while his friends connected it to a car with a tow-rope. During the preparations, Jeff availed himself of the opportunity to urinate in the toilet.

The tow began. Jeff estimates that the portable toilet was traveling at least 30 mph when the tow-rope broke. The portable toilet flipped several times before it came to rest (door side up, thank goodness).

After Jeff's friends poured a bottle of rubbing alcohol into the wound, and Jeff took a lengthy shower, he came home and went to bed.

Jeff adamantly insists that he was 100% sober the whole time.

Submitted on 04/08/2005

Submitted by: Clifton Palmer McLendon
Reference: (personal report)

Copyright © 2005 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Daniel said:
Neutral: Personal Account
I'm a little unhappy with the full names, but it's pretty funny.


Jack said:
Neutral: Personal Account
No comment, other than to suggest that perhaps Jeff should find other friends...


Charles said:
Neutral: Personal Account
I'd agree with Jack. Unless, of course, Jeff _wants_ to be a contender. I have also asked Darwin to edit the full names and email addresses out of the story...


Kelly said:
Neutral: Personal Account
I agree with removing the names, and I suggest that Jeff be warned that pouring rubbing alcohol (which doesn't sterilize anyway) into an open wound can result in alcohol poisoning, which could kill him.


Tracy said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I'd like to thank Jeff for his contribution, and ask him to keep practising, and maybe, just maybe, he may achieve DA greatness in the future :)


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