This happened only a few days ago.

A work colleague told me of a friend of his, who has a high-powered motorcycle.

Someone told him that he could bring the paintwork on the tank of the beast to a high shine by using a proprietory brand of aerosol furniture polish. So he tried it, and was duly impressed by the results.

Friend-of-colleague then thinks. "Hey! the seat looks a little dingy. I wonder if the polish would work on that?" So he applies it, and soon the seat looks dazzlingly bright and shiny.

So impressed is he by his handiwork that he decides to go out for a ride to show it off.

He comes up to a junction at his customary speed, which means that he has to apply the brakes with some force.

He then realises that, as with many things in life, what is shiny also tends to be slippery.

The seat is directly behind the tank.

The tank has a filler cap.

The filler cap is on the top of the tank.

The filler cap is rather large.

He managed to bring the bike safely to a stop and prop it up.

Passers-by were then treated to the sight of a man rolling around on the grass at the side of the road, tighly clutching his crotch. He seemed to be crying for some reason.

Time alone may tell whether he has permanently removed himself from the gene pool, or whether he simply won't be able to swim for a while.

Submitted on 08/30/2003

Submitted by: Nigel Stapley
Reference: None

Copyright © 2003 DarwinAwards.com

Gregory said:
Maybe Toss: Lacks Excellence
I haven't ridden a motorbike since I was a kid, but I don't recall the friction of the seat having much to do with keeping one from sliding forward. More likely hands on the handlebars and feet on the footpegs. Has that Friend of a Friend (FOAF) quality that makes me doubt its veracity.

Bill said:
Neutral: Honorable Mention
I don't think the stupidity is really DA grade here, but the write-up did make me laugh, so I'll let it slide: let the readers decide.

Bert said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Different from the ususal boo of putting Armor-all on the motor bike's tire side walls...

Jack said:
Neutral: Personal Account
It's been a long time since I was in college, so I'll defer to Charles on the question of when and how Newton's Laws kicked in. But since this week marks the 100th anniversary of the Harley motor bikes, I say let the riders - sorry, readers - decide.

Charles said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Perhaps worthy of inclusion -- though I'm a little unsure of the stupidity involved. It would seem to me that something shiny has a higher than normal static friction, and lower dynamic, meaning that you stick in one place longer and then suddenly let go hard -- so he might not have known he was in trouble until the brakes went on... even if he had tested the seat earlier for slipperiness.

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