The Luckiest Unlucky Man Alive 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
The Luckiest Unlucky Man Alive
Adelaide Australia, June 2003
This is the story of friends Brother. Whilst studying Electrical Engineering my friend confided in me the following stories of his brother. I knew his brother because all three of us had attended the same school. To protect the innocent we will call him Jacob.
I will first give you some background into the life of this unlucky individual. This event I actually witnessed. Whilst playing cricket Jacob had been batting only three balls when a perfect slow ball was bowled. He promptly stepped up on knocked the ball 10meters (roughly 30feet) into a fence post of diameter of 7.5cm(3inches) and of all the directions it could have flown it flew square off at hit the stumps.
After high school Jacob focussed his efforts on electricity, much to my amusement having studied the energy source and having respect for its ferocity when abused. One day Jacob was found on the kitchen floor by his brother, when asked how he got to be there, he admitted he had tried to turn on the heater. When the heater was turned on promptly smoke started to spew from the heater. Jacob showed unusual respect for his own existence here and turned off the heater, and turned on the light to inspect the heater better. However when he turned on the light the globe blew. So retrieving a new globe he climbed onto the kitchen bench to replace the globe. However couldn’t remember whether he had turned the light off. Not wanting to be blinded by the globe when it suddenly lit up, he decided to test whether the socket was live by inserting his finger. Needless to say the next thing he remembered was being woken up on the kitchen floor.
I finally cracked and decided to write to you over his latest incident. He had just bought a sports car, a Toyota Supra. On the day he bought it, he pushed it over the red line and promptly the car came to a stop. Going home he got his mothers car to tow his car to the garage. He fastened a tow-rope to his car. However after towing the car down to the first corner he realised his mistake, not having anyone in the car behind. So as soon as he turned the corner the back end of his mothers car was pulled out causing him to drive into a tree, which was promptly followed by his car rear ending his mothers car. Total damage bill for the day $6000. However he is still alive but without children. So there is hope for an Award yet.
Submitted on 06/10/2003
Submitted by:
sscooter16@hotmail.com
Reference:
Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com
|
